Cooking is one of those things that takes skill and time and can be stressful for a lot of people.

Not everyone enjoys the process, but it’s important to know how to cook and kitchen safety, as that’s part of every day life.

This woman was attempting to help her friend learn how to properly cook over facetime. When disaster struck and there was an emergency, she yelled.

Now, her friend is mad at her and she’s not sure if she did the right thing. Let’s find out…

AITA for yelling at my friend during a kitchen fire?

This happened this past Friday when I (31F) was FaceTiming my friend “Alex” (28F) while we were cooking dinner.

For some context: I love Alex, like if I needed to hide a body she is 100% the person I would call.

She’s also just a really bad cook, the main reason being she’s terrified of fire/hot oil because of an accidental burn she got as a kid.

That can make cooking difficult.

But she said she’s tired of living off takeout so I said why don’t we FaceTime while cooking the same meal so it’s less scary (we don’t live in the same city).

Friday comes, I don’t remember what we’re talking about but the camera’s angled so I could see she was standing in front of the stove when the contents of one of the pans caught on fire.

Alex freaks out, looks around and doesn’t seem to know what to do, so I stop what I’m doing and tell her to put a lid on the pan.

She’s still freaking out, saying she’s gonna grab water, I tell her DO NOT get water, just cover the pan.

Her friend is looking out for her!

She starts crying, she doesn’t seem to be listening and I’m getting worried, but I’m trying to calm her down and telling her to find a lid or something to smother the fire when she gets the idea to *pick up the pan that’s actively on fire* and at that point yes I did raise my voice and I told her something to the effect of “Alex shut up, put that down, and just cover the pan.”

Eventually Alex uses another pan to cover the fire and turns everything off.

I’m talking to her and I’m relieved she’s ok, she’s still crying (understandably) and after a minute she gets this look on her face and asks why I yelled at her.

I tell her I’m sorry but that in the heat of the moment it was necessary since I couldn’t do anything from behind the screen and she wasn’t listening/putting out the fire so in the heat of the moment I yelled.

Emotions were high.

We go back and forth a little, in the end she calls me a bad friend and hangs up. I’m a little taken aback but I’m thinking maybe we can talk when we’ve both calmed down a little.

When I don’t hear from her the next morning I text her saying I’m sorry how our last conversation ended and asking if she’s ok.

She replies back with a voice note saying she’s angry at me for yelling and, in her words, making an already terrifying situation worse.

She brings up how I know she’s scared of kitchen fires and feels that I used that against her (I’m not sure what she means by that?), she feels hurt, and that she needs space.

That seems a bit extreme.

I’m confused, I send her a voice message back saying I’m sorry for scaring her, but also again that in the moment she was making very dangerous decisions (trying to add water to a kitchen fire, waving around a blazing pan) and that I was scared for her. It’s now Sunday night/early Monday and she hasn’t responded.

I feel bad for yelling, but I also don’t think what I did was really that out of line or that it merits this reaction.

I don’t think I need to apologize again, but maybe I’m really wrong and I just can’t see it? Is there something I need to do to make up for this?

Let’s get into the comments.

This person has a theory about her friend’s reaction.

Another person suggests her friend stay away from cooking with oil.

A commenter even suggested cooking classes!

Overall, everyone agreed that she did the right thing.

You know, maybe cooking isn’t for everyone…

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.