We’ve all got those family members who have a signature dish.

And it’s not uncommon for an invite to an event to be accompanied by a request for them to make that dish that the whole family loves.

That’s what happened to the woman in this story – except they weren’t requesting her dish, just the recipe.

And the invite for her company was extremely late too.

Read on to find out what happened here.

AITA for not giving my aunt the recipe to the buns I make for the holidays even though I didn’t make them for Christmas?

For the past five or so years I’ve made milk bread buns for almost every holiday or event I go to or host. I’ve made the recipe so often that I have it memorized and can adapt it however I like.

The recipe is not mine, it comes from one of my favorite cookbooks called Mooncakes and Milkbread.

For thanksgiving I made the dough with pumpkin puree from pumpkins I grew, and stuffed it with a chai cream cheese filling.

I was pretty freaking proud of that one.

But this Christmas was different.

Recently I was removed from the family group chat for a dumb reason.

My brother kept getting added on his work phone and kept leaving and I finally posted in it “please stop adding him back. He uses the phone for work. I will send him important things directly from the chat.”

My mother removed me when I wasn’t paying attention.

I did not know I was removed till a few weeks ago when she was like “oh I forgot you’re not a part of the family chat – since you hate group chats I removed you.”

Yikes! Let’s see how she felt about that.

I’m used to random stuff like this being twisted. Whatever. No big deal.

I don’t feel like most of the family on my maternal side like me much anyways, so at the end of the day, fine.

I’m kind of the black sheep. I had my daughter at 18, I’m an atheist, I’m covered in tattoos, the normal stuff. But since I quit drinking a year and a half ago my relationship with my family has suffered even more.

Like I don’t feel like I have anything in common with most of them anymore. The ones who’d say dumb stuff I used to just brush off now irritate me to no end.

But the removal from the group had a detrimental effect on her baking plans.

Because of this, I only found out that Christmas at my grandpa’s was going to be on actual Christmas Day the day before.

The last I heard before that was that they were doing it on the 28th.

Since I worked Christmas Eve I didn’t have time to arrange time to make them.

But with the invite to Christmas I was also asked for my bun recipe.

She wasn’t about to make it that easy for her family to erase her though.

Apparently they asked my 13 year old daughter (who was hanging out at my Grandpa’s on Christmas Eve, since one of my other siblings who she’s super close to was visiting) first.

She told them “that’s kind of mom’s thing.”

When they asked me I told them “it’s milk bread buns, you can google the recipe.” But I knew they wouldn’t.

I didnt want the one consistent thing I bring to be brought by someone else. It happens at Christmas and now what about Easter? Is it just going to be assumed they make them then too?

AITA?

If the family wanted her milk buns, they needed to keep her in the loop better.

You can’t ice someone out, but keep the bits that you like.

She was right not to share her recipe – they didn’t deserve it.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit made of this.

This person thought that the real problem here was the woman’s mom.

And others even suggested going low or no contact with her exploitative family.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought that keeping recipes to yourself was a very normal thing to do.

Sure, it might’ve been a nice thing to share her recipe.

And if her family were being nice to her, then maybe she would.

But as it stands, they’re being standoffish and rude.

They don’t deserve her milk buns – or her and her daughter, for that matter.

If you liked that post, check out this post about a rude cusfacetomer who got exactly what they wanted in their pizza.