Weddings have a funny way of revealing exactly where you stand with someone.

So when one woman noticed she was excluded from her friend’s pre-wedding events, but later received a surprise invitation to the ceremony, the timing felt a little suspicious.

Suddenly, she was using a simple RSVP as the code to decoding her friend group’s social hierarchy.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for asking a friend if my wedding save-the-date got lost?

I’ve been friends with a close group of women from college for over a decade.

However, in the last few years since I had a child, one friend, Jenny, pushed me away. She stopped inviting me to things or coming to things I invited her to and got chilly.

Her friend was never really honest with her about the problem, so gradually they grew apart.

After a while of this behavior, I asked her directly about it to see if anything was wrong, and she deflected.

I don’t see her very often anymore and stopped inviting her to stuff.

We were close and always celebrated each other’s life events.

She can’t help but reminisce on how close they used to be.

She even threw my baby shower (which I was very grateful for and got her a gift).

I would absolutely have come to a wedding or life event of hers, even if it was across the world.

Jenny and her fiancé are getting married soon in a destination wedding.

At first, she thought she had been snubbed an invite.

I didn’t get a save-the-date, which hurt my feelings a bit.

Last month, I saw posts on social media about her bachelorette party.

I was one of two women in our group not invited. All other bach parties in our group included all the women.

So when it arrived last minute, she got a little suspicious.

Suddenly, last night, I got an invitation to her wedding.

I am 90% sure she got some declines and I made the cut.

I suppose it’s technically possible a save-the-date ended up in my spam filter, but I doubt it.

I don’t feel comfortable talking with Jenny because the last time I tried, she wouldn’t talk about it.

WIBTA if I asked a mutual friend if a save-the-date was lost?

Is she right to take this personally, or is it a big reach?

Redditors chime in with their two cents.

This commenter seems to think asking would lead to more trouble than it’s worth.

Maybe this is all just the uncomfortable reality of adult friendships.

This commenter seems to think it’s really not that complicated.

Pettiness isn’t the right energy to be approaching this with.

She got the invite she wanted, but just not on the timeline she preferred.

Maybe the grown-up response here is just letting it go.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.