If you had a less-than-ideal childhood, it’s not uncommon to want to distance from family as you build your own life as an independent adult.

At the same time, it’s completely normal to want to maintain a relationship with your siblings – after all, you went thought childhood together.

The woman in this story left home at eighteen and built a life for herself, and was keen to help her sister out when she became an adult too.

But the reality of the situation turned out very differently to how she might’ve hoped.

Read on to find out what happened.

AITA for not inviting my sister on my trip?

I am a twenty year old woman, and I have an eighteen-year-old sister who I have recently let move in with me.

At first I was excited about this because I was getting her out of my dad’s toxic household, and on top of that I was happy that we had opportunities to get closer now.

I love my sister and have always wanted to be close, but we have had a lot of falling outs. I figured this time it could all be resolved and we could have the relationship I wanted.

However, I was wrong.

Let’s see what is going so wrong between these two sisters.

My sister has changed in the two years since I moved out. She’s become a sensitive person to a pretty high degree, and will get angry at me a lot and tell me I am rude for small things.

I don’t have much of a problem with this, and I’ll often apologize and try to be aware of how she feels, but usually she doesn’t accept it.

She will eventually storm off screaming or crying, and sometimes will drive off erratically while sobbing.

It’s been things as little as her saying I don’t say anything outright rude, but the tone I use is rude – or she will say sometimes if I choose not to sit by her at the table I’m being rude.

Yikes! Understandably, the older sister is finding this overwhelming.

If I tell her I wasn’t trying to be and apologize it’s not good enough. She wants me to admit every time that I’m rude and if I don’t agree, she will storm off sobbing.

A lot of times when she storms off like this, we don’t end up having rational conversations and she will hold grudges, and often bring up these instances later just to argue about them more.

I feel confused a lot because I have tried apologizing and talking to her but it’s not enough, she’s still angry, but I don’t necessarily understand what else I’m supposed to do.

I’ve even offered to buy her lunch or take her places she enjoys going, even cancelling important plans before, but no matter what she says I’m rude and don’t care about her.

And this situation continued to get worse.

Recently we went on a trip where we stayed at a hotel together. This trip meant a lot to me, because I got to meet celebrities I really liked.

My sister was driving in an area she didn’t know, and I had GPS connected to her car. The GPS told her to turn right and for some reason she didn’t, and I told her she missed the turn and she started screaming at me, saying “well if you would’ve told me to turn there, I would’ve known” and blaming me.

We started arguing (I know this is partly my fault) and it ended with her sobbing in a parking lot we didn’t even know, saying that I ruin her life.

She then refused to stop to get me food because she was mad at me, and refused to talk to me most of the trip, basically ruining it for me in the process after knowing how long I had waited.

This has compelled the older sister to take action.

After this encounter, I told her I didn’t feel comfortable with her going on any other trips I have planned this year.

I feel guilty because she thinks I don’t care about her, but I don’t want all these trips to revolve around her lashing out.

Some of my family tells me I’m just not accepting that she’s different than me, so I’m not sure if there’s something I’m missing because I just don’t understand anymore.

AITA?

It was a nice thing to allow her younger sister to move in with her, but it really seems like the situation isn’t tenable right now, and the two sisters would be better off living apart.

It sounds like the sisters had a tough upbringing and this has understandably had an impact on the younger sister, to the point that she is struggling emotionally.

But her older sister doesn’t need to be the one dealing with this, it is not her responsibility.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit made of this.

This person agreed that the younger sister needs therapy and a new place to live.

However, others thought there was a route for them to get through things together.

Meanwhile, this Redditor explained that both sisters would benefit from professional help.

Abusive parents really do have a lot to answer for, given the lifelong effects they can have on their kids’ mental health.

These two sisters seem to have coped with an abusive father in different ways, and now they’re butting heads as a result.

It’s not their fault. But they both need help.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.