Navigating the job market while still living at home is already hard enough without your parent deciding your effort isn’t good enough.

One college graduate spent a year trying to find a job after college and had already enrolled in a master’s program.

So when her mother called her a “big disappointment” still being unemployed, it became clear just how toxic their relationship had become.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITAH / Didn’t Find A Job

Just got off the phone with my mom, who hadn’t been talking to me for a few days.

I (24F) begged her to tell me what’s wrong, and she spewed out that I’m not the daughter she’d hoped for and that I’m a big disappointment.

She said I’m too “wild” and that I’ve lost my track.

Because of their rift, this woman had been staying away from home.

I’m currently at my boyfriend’s house right now because being in their house has been so horrific.

She said I’m wild because I return home around 10PM and leave in the morning around 7AM.

Well, the thing is, I wouldn’t leave the house if her and her husband didn’t act like my existence was toxic. It’s so uncomfortable in the house, so I just leave.

She hadn’t been following the path her mother had expected for her.

They’re mad at me because I couldn’t get a nice job with my English bachelor’s degree.

I did “waste” a year trying to find qualified jobs that would help out, but it was to no avail.

So I’m going back to school this spring to get my master’s in education. She knows this.

Still, her mother can’t seem to find any compassion for her.

But she yelled and got snippy and nasty with me because I don’t stay home — even though when I am home, I’m just in my room and away from the “family.”

I come home around 10PM because I respect their wishes that they don’t want me spending the night with my boyfriend.

It just seems like a control thing — she just wants me in the house.

She understands to a certain degree, but also still feels she’s being treated unfairly.

I get their disappointment, but the way they are making me feel in the house and then expecting me to be in the house — doing nothing?

I just feel horrible as a human being right now.

AITA?

This is no way for a mother to treat her daughter.

What did Reddit think?

This commenter seems to take the mom’s side.

This user’s judgement depends on how hard this woman is working to find any job at all.

At this point, any job would likely improve this young woman’s quality of life.

This commenter gives her the words of encouragement she clearly needs to hear.

This college graduate deserves a lot more grace than she’s getting.

This mother needs to realize that your job (or lack of one) shouldn’t define your worth as a human being.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.