It’s frustrating when rules seem to apply differently depending on who you are.

So, what would you do if your manager singled you out over something everyone else was allowed to do? Would you go along with it to avoid conflict? Or would you start thinking about taking the issue higher?

In the following story, one employee is left facing this very decision and is leaning toward the latter. Here’s what’s going on.

WIBTA? My manager wants to have a separate dress code for me vs. my coworkers because my appearance could be “concerning” and “have a negative influence on students.” I want to raise this issue higher up.

I (24m) work as a library technician in a private school library.

It’s really hot where I live, and most of the other male staff and teachers are wearing shorts and short-sleeved collared shirts, etc.

The dress code is a bit more relaxed for us support staff vs teachers, but I still dress formally to err on the safe side.

It was hot, so he wore lighter clothes.

Today was the first really hot day since term 1, and I guess they haven’t seen me in shorts since then. So I’m wearing a white short-sleeved, collared shirt, formal, above-the-knee black shorts, and lace-up brogues. Standard workwear for this climate.

When I got there, my manager pulled me aside and said that in the future I might not want to wear shorts because my appearance was concerning and might be a bad influence on the students.

I didn’t know what to say in the moment. I really wanted to point out that my coworkers dress MUCH more casually, but I didn’t want to seem snarky.

He could see if it was the kids speaking up, but it wasn’t.

I’m a quasi-recovering anorexic. I’m aware I’m still a bit underweight, but I don’t think it’s fair for me to have to change the way I dress just because it makes “the students” uncomfortable.

They haven’t said anything, so I think this is just her personal feelings on it tbh? Like, if a student has said something, I get it, but just because it makes her uncomfortable doesn’t mean I have to slog through this unbearable heat in heavy clothes.

I want to know if I would be overreacting or if I would be wrong if I raised this issue with someone higher up, or if I’m overreacting for even thinking this much about it.

AITA?

Yikes. That does sound like double standards.

Let’s see how the readers over at Reddit feel about what happened here.

This person wants more info.

Here’s someone who thinks he should talk to HR.

According to this comment, it’s hard for everyone.

This reader offers a good solution.

What a tough situation.

It sounds like he should just go along with what she said to keep the peace.

If you liked this post, check out this story about an employee who got revenge on a co-worker who kept grading their work suspiciously low.