Imagine falling in love with a best friend you’ve known since you were a child. Now, you’re all grown up, going to college and living together. What would you do if your dad didn’t consider your partner family and didn’t think he should be welcome at family events and activities?

In this story, one young woman is in this exact situation, and she finally called her dad out on his behavior towards her boyfriend. It led to an argument, and now she’s wondering if she was too harsh.

Let’s read all about it to decide.

AITA for asking my dad why I should include his wife if he plans to never include my boyfriend?

I (19f) have been dating Leo (19m) for over a year now. We’ve known each other since we were 6 and we’ve been a part of the same friend group since we met.

My parents (mom and dad) both knew him from a young age and he was really sweet when my mom died. Dad even commented back then about how kind he was to me.

My dad has been with his wife for 2 years now and they’ve been married for 6 months.

Her dad wants to exclude Leo from everything.

Ever since I told my dad I was dating Leo he’s been SO different about him. I got a hard time for bringing him to a family party in June and dad said it was inappropriate to bring just anyone to a family party.

I ran it by the relative hosting and they were fine with it. My dad never complained about friends joining before.

Dad and his wife have shown up unannounced when Leo and I were hanging out and they wanted to leave him out. Dad makes it a big deal if I want to include Leo ever. It’s not even all the time.

Both of them were really off with Leo when dropped by unannounced a couple of weeks ago too and this led to a fight.

She was honest.

Leo went on a grocery run and I confronted my dad.

I asked dad why he was being like that and how did he expect me to want him to visit if he’d be that way.

His wife said they don’t like seeing me be in such a serious relationship and the fact I’m bringing him to things is strange when he’s not family and he’s just a partner and I should listen to them.

I asked her who she was to say that.

Her dad seems pretty hypocritical.

Dad said she’s right and she’s his wife and our family. He said it’s so totally different.

I told him he would never have let me treat her that way before they were married either.

He claimed it was still different and I should be willing to spend time with them without Leo.

And I have btw. I have visited on my own and met for lunch without Leo. He’s not always there. But we go to the same college and we’re living together with some friends for the summer and will be full time moving in together in a couple of weeks.

It’s different how exactly?

But anyway, dad said Leo isn’t family and some stuff should be just for family.

So I asked why his wife was always there. I asked why I should include her if he won’t ever include Leo, she’s not MY family after all. Why it was any of his wife’s business when she’s got no say on my life.

Dad said she’s family, they’re married.

I asked again would I need to marry Leo for things to change again and he just said it’s different.

Her dad seems to be repeating himself.

His wife said I had no business invalidating her and she’s the future grandmother of my children.

I told her good luck with that. She’s not my mother and she will never be their grandmother and since we’re excluding partners that’s all she’ll ever be, married or not, since that’s what dad’s saying he’ll do.

Dad told me that was enough and he never said that.

I told him he keeps saying it’s different and not that marriage would change anything so I see no reason to include his wife.

She seems like the most mature person in the room.

I then made them leave which they did not do easily. They wanted to keep the fight going but I told them I was done.

They’re now angry I invalidated his wife by asking about including her and saying she won’t be the future grandmother.

But I stand by it. My kids might not know grandpa if he’s a jerk to their dad and wants to act like he doesn’t exist.

AITA?

I think her dad just doesn’t like seeing his little girl growing up. He can’t wrap his mind around the fact that Leo is as important to her as his wife is to him. I don’t think she did anything wrong. Either her dad is being stubborn or he really doesn’t understand how hypocritical he’s being.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this situation.

This is a good suggestion.

This person makes a very good point!

This is funny!

Another person calls the stepmom “bizarre.”

What an awful family dynamic!

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.