Forgiveness on the other person’s timeline isn’t really forgiveness — it’s convenience.

So when a woman whose estranged family had spent years refusing her olive branches got approached by her sibling at their grandma’s funeral, she said “no thanks” to talking it out.

The fallout was loud, but her answer was clear.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for ignoring my sister at my grandma funeral

I (28F) was a royal AH to my sister growing up. It all stemmed from my dad passing away and not handling grief very well.

I was a jerk and it got worse when my mother remarried. At the time I don’t want her to be with anyone else.

Looking back, she knows she was in the wrong, so she tries to take steps to better herself.

I was a monster growing up and I know that. I was a verbal AH to basically everyone.

When I left for college I realized I had a problem and went to therapy.

Unfortunately, a lot of damage had already been done with her family.

I apologized to my sister and the rest of the family and they wanted nothing to do with me.

So she decides to keep her head up and accept this is the bed she’s made.

I tried for a few more years after but I accepted it and moved on.

I rarely see them since I am not invited to stuff in general.

It was hard to move on from losing my family but it has been 9 years. I am 28 now and have accepted it. I am married and own a home.

So when she did get the opportunity to see her family again, things didn’t go as expected.

My grandma passed away and she is one of the people I am still in contact with. She was a wonderful woman and her funeral was this week.

My mom/stepdad and sister were there.

I don’t go up to them or anything like that.

Her sister tried to reach out to her, but she completely blew her chance.

My sister caught me in the parking lot before I was going to head home and wanted to talk.

I told her I didn’t want to and headed to my car.

Now her family is mad at her yet again.

I have been getting texts from the family about how I owe it to her to talk to her and my parents (mom/stepdad) called me ungrateful in a message.

That I ignore my sister, I haven’t responded but I really want to tell everyone that grandma was my only family left.

AITA?

This family has a lot going on.

What did Reddit think?

This user thinks she’s already given her family more than enough chances.

But maybe ignoring the people she wants to eventually reconcile with isn’t the best move long term.

Everyone has the right to make their own decisions here.

This family needs to work it out, but maybe a parking lot of a funeral isn’t the best place to do it.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman hoping to reconnect with her mother, but who is disappointed when her mom immediately tries to use a gift as emotional leverage.