Many little girls grow up imagining what they’ll name their future children.

This woman had planned to name a future daughter after her grandmother since she was a child, and her twin brother knew how much the name meant to her.

When he gave his own daughter a very similar name, she made sure to ask whether he was comfortable with her still using the name she had always wanted.

He told her yes more than once, which made her feel confident she wasn’t stepping on anyone’s toes.

That’s why she felt completely blindsided when her sister-in-law accused her of stealing the name after her daughter was born.

Read on to see what happened next.

AITA for giving my daughter a similar name to my brother’s daughter?

I (F27) have always wanted to name my daughter after my grandma since I was a little kid.

My twin brother was aware of this, but landed on a name for his daughter that is very similar. Think Lilly vs. Lilliana.

We talked on the phone before his daughter was born, and he mentioned that they weren’t even the same name, so I should be all set to still name a daughter Lilly if I ever had one.

Before making a decision, she spoke with her brother.

Fast-forward 1.5 years, and I get pregnant with a daughter. I talked to him again and wanted to double-check that he and his wife were okay with my daughter having a name so similar. He assured me that she’s my baby and I am free to name her whatever I like.

My husband and I landed on Lilly Deanna (Deanna was his grandma’s name) and again checked that they were cool with this. He said it was a little similar but reiterated that it was fine.

At this point, I assumed he had talked with his wife. I would have reached out to her myself, but I don’t have her phone number, and she routinely friends and then unfriends me on Facebook (she’s done this to my mom and grandma as well), so I couldn’t reach out there either.

Unfortunately, her SIL was not happy about it.

When I eventually gave birth to my baby girl, my husband made a post on Facebook announcing the birth of our daughter with her full name. That same day, my brother called my mom to let her know that his wife had seen the post (despite not being friends with either of us?) and was livid that I would upstage her baby with such a similar name.

At this point, I was kind of blindsided. I’m a huge people pleaser, and upsetting her was the last thing I wanted to do, hence why I asked if it was okay so many times. She DM’d me through Messenger and said it’s deeply weird that I stole their name.

So at this point, I’m freaking out. I sent her a LONG message explaining that I thought she already knew, explained the importance those names have to us, and asked if we could find a way to work this out between us.

It didn’t go well when she tried to talk with her.

She responded to that with this, “I appreciate you sharing this with me. I do not want to better our relationship. Or have one with you at all.”

After that, she blocked me, and we haven’t spoken in 7 months.

Now my brother and his family (wife and 3 kids) are traveling from their state, 8 hours away, to mine to visit our family. This is the first time she is going to meet any of my extended family.

Now, she’s unsure how to feel.

I’m not sure what to think. I really tried to make sure this wouldn’t happen before I gave her the name, but it happened anyway. The people-pleasing part of me is kind of dying, but another part of me feels like I shouldn’t care what she thinks.

She has refused a relationship with me and my parents from the beginning because she feared that we would treat her two children from a previous marriage as less than family. As a result, I’ve only met those kids twice and haven’t seen any of them (minus my brother) in over two years.

Basically, I just want to make sure I’m not going crazy here. I’m going to see her in a week, and I don’t even know what to say!

AITA?

Wow! Dealing with the SIL sounds exhausting.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a young woman who struggles with her new reality after learning her adoption story was a lie.

Let’s see what the folks over at Reddit think.

Hey, he chose her!

This person sees no problem with it.

According to this comment, the brother probably knew the reaction would be like that.

Exactly!

The sister-in-law’s reaction makes absolutely no sense.

This woman spent years planning to use a family name and even checked with her brother multiple times before her daughter was born.

Despite all of that, the sister-in-law acted as if she had committed some terrible betrayal.

If anything, the woman went far beyond what most people would have done to make sure there were no hard feelings, and she still ended up getting blamed for it.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a woman who freaks out after a neighbor confronts her about the landscaping damage done by her children.