Making decisions for other people based on how you think they might feel is a minefield, and this story walked right into the middle of one.

A woman who lives with her friend’s ex got asked by a mutual friend to host him overnight before a mutual friend’s wedding. The thing is, her roommate had just gone through a fresh breakup and she worried the combination of circumstances would be too much for him.

So she decided to speak on his behalf and decline the request. Her other friend now has to catch a train at 8 AM instead of sleeping over.

As guilt begins to rise, she wonders if she made the right call.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for refusing to let my friend stay a night before a wedding the next day?

My friend Anne has a wedding on Saturday.

Thing is, I currently live with her ex, Frederick.

A common friend, Jay — mine, the bride’s, and her ex’s — will be attending too.

So soon Jay had a favor to ask.

Today, Jay called me to ask if he could stay the night at my place before the wedding, since it would be easier to split the travel instead of traveling all at once on the wedding day.

I said it’s best for him not to stay and to come in the morning instead, so I will pick him up on the way.

She explains that the logistics would be a nightmare.

The wedding starts at 1 PM, the venue is about a one-hour drive from my place, and Jay’s home is about 2.5 hours from my place.

He’d have to hop on a train at 8 AM to get to my place in time.

But there are other reasons too.

The problem is that Frederick broke up with his current girlfriend this week and is understandably a bit sad.

I feel that it would be a weird vibe having everyone together, since he would know that Jay would be staying because of his previous ex’s wedding.

Given the current circumstances, it would feel like rubbing it all in his face.

She continues to act like she knows how everyone else is feeling without actually asking them.

I mean, he is well over his relationship with Anne, but he had a hard time with it in the past, attending therapy and everything.

I think he would like to hang out with Jay on any other occasion, but I have a weird feeling about this one.

I know if I asked him about it, he would definitely say that it’s okay and that Jay can stay and we can all hang out together the evening before.

Now she isn’t sure how to proceed.

But I wouldn’t be able to tell whether he would actually be okay with that or just being nice.

Should I allow Jay to stay the night at mine and Frederick’s place?

AITA for not letting him stay and making it inconvenient for him?

What a dramatic mess.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a hiring manager who is shocked by an applicant’s entitled attitude about working full time.

What did Reddit think?

This user agrees that there’s a lot of mind reading going on and not a lot of communicating.

If it’s partly his place, then it’s partly his decision.

Something doesn’t seem right for this commenter.

She needs to stop putting words in other peoples’ mouths.

Ultimately she had one conversation she needed to have and she chose not to have it.

Sure, the situation was layered and the timing was genuinely tricky, but making a call on behalf of a grown adult who’s been through therapy and come out the other side, without giving him the chance to weigh in, is doing a lot of emotional labor nobody asked for.

Next time, she just needs to take 30 seconds and ask the question — the answer might even surprise her.

Her roommate can handle more than she’s giving him credit for.