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Some parents will really make you question your existence!

This guy shares how his alcoholic dad made things horrible for the family.

Check out the full story.

AITAH for not telling my father about my brain surgery

I (26) had to have brain surgery at 18. I have a condition called Chiari type one malformation and it had worsened to the point of needing surgery.

I’ve had health problems my whole life and this was the latest but definitely the scariest due to all the risks.

This is where it all gets worse!

For some back story my father was incredibly abusive to my self my brother and our mom. He was a violent alcoholic my whole life.

My mom petitioned for divorce after I caught him cheating on her (I was 12 at that time). I was never the same after that.

Post divorce he was incredibly cynical and tried many times to sue my mom for custody of me (my brother and I share a mom but have different dads) post divorce I tried to continue our relationship.

I made it clear that if he did three things 1. stop drinking alcohol entirely 2. go to AA for support and 3. go to therapy with me so we could learn to communicate and work through our grievances, that we could start fresh and try to build a new relationship together.

That’s sounds so bad!

He declined and said that ‘he didn’t need to stop drinking and that it wasn’t an addiction he just likes drinking’. I stuck to my boundary and we stopped communicating.

The years went by and my mom was a great single mom but it was hard with everything on her plate alone.

He paid his child support but we never spoke again despite the constant lawsuits in an attempt to stop paying child support he told the court that my mom wasn’t allowing me to see him when in reality she encouraged me constantly to try to communicate but I wasn’t interested.

A few months before the surgery I started a go fund me because the surgery would be outrageously expensive and I wasn’t working due to all the symptoms getting worse that most days I wasn’t even eating or getting up out of bed.

He was having a very rough patch…

I posted the gofundme to my Facebook page and I didn’t know but it was public. My father sees it and calls me and ask’s me why I’m posting about some brain surgery and tells me to stop lying and hangs up.

Following the phone call I text him all the details so he could see for himself the day of the surgery. He never showed, called or texted.

Some time goes by, I have the surgery that went from an 8 hour to a 12 hour long neurosurgery and shaving down of my first few cervical vertebrae.

I couldn’t walk or feed my self because my nervous system was wrecked. Because of this I went to physical, occupational and speech therapies to recover.

I was 18 at the time and I’m 26 now doing much better and walking and caring for my self thank god! It’s a lot of back story I’m sorry for that but I hope it paints a picture of why I did what I did at the end of this post.

He knows he might slightly be at fault…

Here’s where I may be the AH. My father reaches out and tells me that he has changed and he’s sober and he wants to go to therapy. I give him the benefit of the doubt and we start going and meeting on the weekend for lunch or coffee.

At our 10th session or so he asks me why I didn’t tell him about the surgery * eye roll * because I didn’t even get a word in before he hung up after accusing me of lying.

He goes on to tell me how he shouldn’t have found out on facebook and see my wounds/scars (updates for the gofundme that he didn’t even contribute to) and how traumatizing that was for him and how I should have told him.

That’s INSANE!

I went off and I let him have it.

I think all the rage flooded in, it was like word vomit, and I couldn’t stop.

I told him that if maybe he put his only daughter’s health and life first before the bottle maybe he would be more involved and maybe if he didn’t make my mom’s life a living hell in court maybe she or our family would have reached out but after the abuse, the lies, the addiction, the straight up abandonment and the accusations that it wasn’t my responsibility to make him aware or cater to his feelings because I could’ve lost my life, instead of partying and having fun I was drawing up a will and power of attorney incase I ended up in a coma which was a very likely possibility if something went wrong.

We haven’t spoken since and I don’t know if what I said was wrong so I’m here to see what you all think. I think I was justified but maybe I’m wrong. Again apologies for the long back story.

YIKES! That sounds like a lot of drama!

Why can’t people learn from their mistakes?

Let’s find out what folks on Reddit think about this one.

This user has an important question for this guy…

Exactly! This user doesn’t get why the dad is acting the way he is.

This user shares their experience of this surgery.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a mom who wants her daughter to help pay for her own cell phone, but her daughter says she can’t force her to get a job.

This user shares how it is okay to be hurt in such situations.

This user knows this guy is not at fault!

Somebody needs to let go of certain things…