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When you first have children, unless you are totally naive you’ll likely know that there is a whole lot of work involved. You have to feed them, bathe them, clothe them, potty train them, help them with their problems, teach them to read and write, provide plenty of love at all times – and all the while, you most likely have to work a full time job in order to support them now and into the future.

But even in that extensive list, no one mentioned the logistics. Because if you have more than one kid, they probably have different extra curriculars to go to at the same time, different friends to visit, school trips and events, birthday parties, dentist appointments, and all sorts of other things to fit – for each child – into your own schedule. It’s no wonder family planners are such a popular holiday gift.

The mom in this story was used to the logistics of motherhood, and had arranged with another parent to share the pick ups and drop offs for summer camp. And all was going well – until another parent got involved. And this dad? He wasn’t as prepared as the rest.

Read on to find out what happened.

AITA for refusing to transport a child home when the parent wouldn’t confirm pickup details?

My daughter (Louisa, 10) was going to an out of state camp about three hours away for a week. A friend (Maria) was driving her kids up, as well as a boy (Charlie, 10) that she knows. She asked if my daughter wanted to ride up with them, and Louisa happily agreed.

Maria said that after camp she would be going to her parents’ home in another state, so she wouldn’t be able to bring Louisa or Charlie back home. She suggested that Charlie’s dad and I coordinate a carpool.

I told her that I would be picking Louisa up (since I do not know Charlie or his dad), but if Charlie needed a ride, I would be willing.

I didn’t hear anything from Charlie’s dad, so I figured he felt the same way I did and would drive Charlie himself.

But all was not as it seemed.

The day of departure, I brought Louisa to Maria’s house. Charlie and his dad were there as well. Maria wanted to know if we had worked out the details for the time/meeting place since I would be driving Charlie home.

I was slightly annoyed that Charlie’s dad never bothered to get in touch with me to ask personally if I would be OK with it. However, I did offer, so it is what it is.

The kids needed to be picked up Saturday morning, and by Friday morning I still hadn’t heard from Charlie’s dad, so I asked Maria for his info. I texted him and asked if Charlie still needed a ride. He replied a few hours later with “yes.”

I told him, “not a problem,” and let him know that I would be picking them up at 9am, which means we would be getting home about noon.

However, she never expected that to be the end of the conversation.

I suggested a meeting place not too far from the highway since we live about an hour from each other. No response. I texted him a couple of hours later and asked if everything I said sounded OK.

I called him Friday evening and left a message. I called Saturday morning. I then texted him and let him know that I would not be driving his child home unless we agreed on a time/place to meet. No response.

I arrived at the camp at 9am as planned, waited a half hour to hear from Charlie’s dad. We had my grandfather’s 85th birthday party to attend at 1:30pm, so we could not stay there all day. I made the decision to leave without Charlie.

The counselors were present, and the camp was still fully operational, so Charlie was supervised and not left alone.

But this decision didn’t go down well with everyone.

Around 11am, his dad finally responded. He sent a text saying the time/place I mentioned would be fine. I immediately called him to let him know I did not have Charlie with me, and he lost his mind.

I told him he needed to calm down since he was on speaker phone and my daughter was in the car. I ended up having to hang up on him.

He called back and left a message saying he worked late and slept in because of it, and responded to me as quickly as he could. I understand I offered to help with transport, but I didn’t feel comfortable taking his child without any confirmed plan or communication.

Not every person I’ve told this to agrees with what I did. I need to know, was I wrong for leaving Charlie?

AITA?

This mom did the best she could – because there is no way she should be picking up someone else’s kid, that she doesn’t even know, without knowing where to drop him off.

In fact, without confirmation, the dad should have been right there picking up his son, not ignoring the woman’s messages.

Something isn’t right about this dad – and his rage on the phone only further proves that.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit made of this.

This person agreed that she did the right thing leaving Charlie behind.

While others thought it was the dad’s responsibility to collect the child, not this woman’s.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought he was really ungrateful in not replying.

One thing is for sure: this guy is not winning any dad of the year awards. He should have been clearly communicating with the woman who was going to collect his son the whole time, not just leaving all the details to her. That seems extremely neglectful, since surely the safety and welfare of his son should have been paramount.

It’s a real shame that collecting the kids has ended up being such a drama for this woman, who for sure just wanted to collect her kid and head to the party. Instead she ended up hanging around for a long time just waiting for the kid’s dad who refused to answer her calls or texts. This is crazy, given his kid was away from home – what if he’d had an emergency and the camp were trying to get in touch with him?

It’s truly unacceptable.