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Living with a friend can seem like the perfect solution when life suddenly turns upside down.

That’s exactly what happened after this woman had to leave her apartment with almost no notice.

With no other place to go, her old friend stepped in and even broke her own lease so they could find a place together.

At first, the arrangement worked well for both of them. But then, the household responsibilities started creating tension, and things slowly became more complicated.

Now she’s preparing to move overseas for work. But after changing one part of their agreement, her roommate has completely shut her out.

Read on to see what you think about this whole thing.

AITA for leaving my roommate halfway through our verbal agreement?

I (21F) had to move out of my previous apartment last year with only 15 days’ notice.

I made a post about it, and my middle school best friend (22F, who I hadn’t spoken to in years but still followed on social media) offered to help. She invited me to move in with her temporarily without paying rent or utilities while we figured out a better situation.

To do that, she actually broke her lease so we could move into a new apartment together. Her landlord tried to take action a few times, but nothing went through. We ended up in a bigger, nicer place, but it was honestly out of my budget.

Their agreement worked out well for awhile.

We agreed she’d pay about 66% of the rent and I’d cover 34%. Utilities were split 50/50. The deposit was three months’ rent (she paid two months, I paid one). I worried she might resent the imbalance, so I offered to take over all the cleaning. She agreed and said she had planned to hire someone anyway due to her disability.

At first, things were great. But after a while, keeping up with all the cleaning became too physically demanding for me, especially while working as a server. I asked to adjust responsibilities.

She responded by making a chore chart listing everything she did daily (dishes, cooking, cat care, etc.), which felt passive-aggressive, so I didn’t engage with that directly. I just asked her to help by sweeping occasionally (I only sweep and mop once a week anyway) so I could mop (she can sweep with some pain but can’t mop).

Now, her roommate is not doing so well.

However, she would only do it on her own timing, making it hard for me to keep up.

A few months later, I got an opportunity to work as an au pair abroad. She was worried about affording the apartment alone, so I offered to keep paying my share of the rent after leaving, but not the utilities. That reassured her at the time.

Now her salary has been reduced, and she’s struggling financially. I’ve finalized my au pair placement, and since my goal is to save for school, I told her I can’t keep paying rent after I leave.

She’s trying to help, but it’s hard.

She didn’t argue, but she’s clearly upset and hasn’t spoken to me in a week. Now I’m worried she won’t return my deposit or pay me back for my share of the furniture. I can’t afford to buy her out, so I’m leaving my bedroom furniture, but I’m scared I won’t get anything back later.

She’s the only one on the lease and arranged the guarantor, so I don’t have a legal obligation.

I’m also paying a full extra month after I leave. Still, she seems to be guilt-tripping me with silence, and I don’t want to help her find a new roommate (there’s a no-subletting clause anyway).

AITA?

Yikes! This sounds like a very stressful time for both of them.

Let’s check out if the folks over at Reddit think she’s wrong for this.

This reader thinks things are going to get hard for her.

According to this comment, she does have a legal obligation to her friend.

She definitely can’t have it both ways.

This is such a good point.

Her roommate took a huge risk to help her when she needed it most. After all, breaking a lease just to get a place together shows a level of commitment that most people would never make.

And then a better opportunity came along for her, and anyone would understand why she wanted to take it.

But though, it’s hard to ignore how this probably looks from the roommate’s side after making such a big sacrifice.

Nobody expects life to stay the same forever. But when one person changes the plan halfway through, hurt feelings usually follow, even if the decision still makes perfect sense.