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Let’s be real: relationships can be complicated. Especially when you’re young. Especially when you’re single. Especially when you’re looking for your person and everyone you meet seems to be, well, not that.

Whether you’ve been catfished or ghosted, most of us have a story of someone who we thought could be the one, and turned out to be very different to the person they presented themselves as.

And these really aren’t nice people since they prey on the one thing that keeps us going in the dating pool – hope.

The woman in this story hasn’t quite been ghosted, but she has been convinced that she’s in a situationship with a guy she only met one time. And sure, he’s stringing her along, speaking with her on the phone all the time whilst dodging any opportunities to meet up again.

His words make out like they have something real, but his actions suggest anything but. And it’s getting in her head so much so that when she finds his ex on Facebook, she creates a fake profile to find out what’s really going on between them.

Read on to find out more.

AITA for messaging my situationship’s ex?

There is this guy I met online and we met once, and were intimate and stuff.

We keep texting and talking daily. He claims I’m important (we are still long distance situationship so of course that’s hard) but… its still kind of an important connection between us.

He lovebombed me a lot into living together, talked about many things we would to, then we met once. It has been six months since meeting and he dodges meeting again – even tho we are both attractive people, so it’s not like I’m simping over him.

He texts me and calls me and made me feel like its more than friendship.

But things are getting weird here.

I know his ex (they broke up three years ago) is still calling him – and she has the same name and age as me.

He told me “she sometimes calls but she wants to borrow money and stuff” – sometimes when he talked to me on phone, she would call and I would ask who is calling you, and he would say “oh its my ex, but i don’t want to talk to her.”

He (my situationship) was distant lately, on and off, we keep talking but then he goes silent.

Now, I know that they lived together in one country and then she moved back to her home country and he left there. But I saw her story – she went back to his country again.

So this woman decided to take action to work out what was going on.

I created a fake Facebook account as a man. I message her. She told me she is in a city one hour from where my situationship lives – and then on Monday, she goes back to the city THEY lived in together.

While this wouldn’t concern me, he told me even after break up, he wouldn’t meet with her when they were in the same city. Then, she tells me she will live in a district one hour away from him. She says she has friends there, the living was good and stuff.

I told her a girl broke my heart. I ask if she can relate.

She says she “lived with a guy for long time and thought she wouldn’t live without him, but then she was happy.”

Then, things started to confirm her suspicions.

I ask, “are you in contact?” She says, “yes.”

I ask, “often or rarely?” She says, “often – I mean sometimes he calls and sometimes I do, we will always be important for each other and when it comes to at least health issues we will support each other”

I ask, “when was the last time you talked?”

She says, “this week.”

And this has led the woman to some solid conclusions.

While I understand being friends with ex, this is not ok. This man floored me with good mornings and goodnights, we slept together on phone calls, and we talk daily. And he has been doing this behind my back.

And now she will live at his city again. And ask him to meet her probably.

Do I confront him that they will meet each other, or do I just keep texting her and keep track on her where she is and stuff?

Also regarding her borrowing money is right. Because she messaged me on that fake account if I could give her some money.

There’s a lot going on here, and not a lot of it good.

The situationship who clearly isn’t serious about the woman he is saying all these things to but refusing to meet? The woman who is catfishing her situationship’s ex? The catfished woman who is herself asking strangers for money?

Nothing is going to finish happily here.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit made of this.

This person thought she was completely wrong for what she was doing.

While others warned her to move forward and leave him in the past.

And this Redditor thought she needed to start acting her age.

The sheer fact that she is putting all this effort into someone that she clearly knows is leading her on and love bombing her is completely unhinged.

And honestly, his love bombing is working, because she’s somehow decided that he’s important enough to take this seriously.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a DJ who promised to do his sister-in-law’s wedding, but says he’ll back out if she insists on including AI songs.

Her gut is telling her that he’s lying to her, that things with his ex are very different than he lets on, and still, rather than simply moving on, she’s going super sleuth to try to find out for herself.

If she doesn’t trust him at this point, which is quite evident, then she never will. And if ever any kind of real relationship blossomed between them, it would all be built on lies and her weird catfishing detective work. Not a good basis to build any kind of relationship on.

But let’s be real. If he’s dodging meeting up with her and will only speak to her on the phone, despite it having been six months since they met, then he’s just not that into her, and she needs to get the message.