Source: Pexels/Reddit

Weddings are rarely as exciting for anyone else involved as they are for the bride and groom. Nonetheless, it’s still a deeply held societal expectation that you enthusiastically show up to grin and bear it.

What would you do if your spouse was about to have a child, but your sibling’s destination wedding was just around the corner? One guy recently shared his predicament like this with Reddit to mixed results. Here’s what happened.

WIBTA for backing out of a destination wedding last minute?

Okay for context, my brother is getting married in Spain in 2 weeks.

My wife and I also just flew to Seattle last weekend for their courthouse wedding and reception.

I have been torn about wanting to go recently as there has been a strain on my relationship with my brother and his wife is not very popular with most family members.

Seems like there’s already a lot going on behind the scenes here.

But after the weekend in Seattle is am less sure about spending thousands of dollars to attend this wedding.

The bride was very upset for most of the courthouse wedding weekend as she did not count it as their actual wedding and was not in the mood to celebrate despite having family travel in for it and having two seperate parties.

That sounds like a personal problem.

I understand their wedding in Spain is the real deal for them I just was expecting a little bit of excitement over finally being married after a 2 1/2 year engagement.

Another aspect that is influencing my decision is the fact that my wife and I moved away from my whole family over a year ago and my brother has made no attempt or mention to visiting.

We however have returned to Seattle to visit 3 times since moving, not including this last trip for the courthouse wedding.

This type of issue becomes all too common in adult relationships.

I am always the one to call and catch up as well.

So part of me thinks that I am continuously going above and beyond for my brother when it is not being reciprocated, and that if it wasn’t for my efforts, we would have little to no relationship.

But has he brought this up to him?

I have not booked the hotels for my trip yet as my wife is in her third trimester and we were waiting to make sure everything stayed healthy and low risk with her pregnancy before I booked anything non-refundable.

She will obviously be staying home while I travel to Spain.

I am needing to book my hotels ASAP and I can’t help but feel torn.

Feeling is one thing, but it’s his actions that matter.

I don’t want to ruin my relationship with my brother but it seems like a lot of money and PTO being spent for people who don’t seem that appreciative.

Between my pregnant wife and the status of my job I feel I have valid excuses if I need them.

None of which would likely go over well.

I am looking for genuine input as I am so far into this I feel I can’t see up.

It’s been a long buildup for this wedding and I don’t want to make the wrong choice here.

Sounds like this guy is just looking for a reason not to go. Let’s see what sage wisdom the good people of Reddit had to offer.

The comments were polarized, half being on the OP’s side.

A few being shocked he even considered going.

But some felt the exact opposite.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a woman who got family pushback after gifting jewelry to her stepdaughter.

And pointed out the likely consequences at hand.

Ultimately, many shared one common opinion.

Sounds like he’d better get ready to hit the road!