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His Older Siblings Branded Him a Bad Influence—And Now He’s Completely Shut Out From His Nieces and Nephews, Left Wondering If He’ll Ever Be Allowed Back Into Their Lives

confused displeased young man looking at camera

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Sibling tension can last for years, and avoiding it sometimes feels easier.

This man stops attending family events around his siblings.

They wanted distance anyway.

See why the rest of the family objects.

AITA for giving my siblings what they want by refusing to spend time around them and their kids?

I’m (20m) 12 years younger than my sister and 14 years younger than my brother. And I remember them always disliking me.

I’m 100% their full bio brother. My parents are my bio parents.

That is something I used to ask myself but dad and I did 23&Me to alleviate my fears of that.

What my parents think is my siblings were jealous of me when I was born and extended family believe the same. They never seemed that excited and they used to act like I was so crazy and wild and out of control.

The older siblings said some pretty mean things.

They even said stuff about me being impossible to control when nobody else was around.

But they were never alone with me.

They avoided me when I was a kid and moved out while I was still young. But I was maybe 10 when they talked about me being a terror as a little kid.

They even called me a monster and said I almost put them off having kids.

The siblings are still mean to him.

Our relationship never changed.

They ignore my birthdays, they ignored my graduation, they didn’t invite me to their weddings or baby showers. And they have said in group chats repeatedly that they don’t want me around to be a bad influence to their kids. That they don’t want their kids to be wild little monsters like I used to be.

Everyone has called them on their nonsense but they say they will not let me influence their kids.

His siblings are the only ones who think he was a crazy, wild kid.

Nobody else has ever complained about me as a kid like that.

At school I was considered too quiet and shy and teachers struggled to get me social or willing to speak in class.

Friends even said I was the quietest and they have zero idea where this comes from.

He has decided to give his siblings what they want.

But after years of hearing it, having them avoid me and saying they don’t want me around their kids, I have decided I won’t be and that anything they attend I will miss so I don’t have to spend any time around them or their kids.

The rest of my family tells me I shouldn’t do that because my nieces and nephews deserve to know me. But it’s more of a headache than it’s worth and there’s no saying we’d be allowed to even say hi to each other.

My parents went nuts on my siblings over this and said how disgusting their treatment of me has always been. They told me my siblings are in the wrong and I should just ignore them.

But it feels like too much nonsense to tolerate. So why not give my siblings what they want and live a more peaceful life. AITA?

His siblings don’t want him around, so he doesn’t want to be around. It seems that the siblings owe him an apology if they change their minds.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

The siblings are the problem.

This person offers a suggestion.

He shouldn’t cut off his whole family.

This person has a suggestion of what to tell his family.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a mom who can’t figure out why her babysitter quit after what she thought was a routine question.

This person can relate to OP’s situation.

After years of being excluded and treated like a bad influence, OP decided to stop showing up wherever his siblings and their kids would be.

Commenters largely agreed he was NTA, though some warned he might regret missing time with the rest of his family.

His siblings wanted space, and he finally gave them the deluxe package.

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