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Her Mom Won’t Stay Out Of Her Business, So She Got Upset After Her Mom Booked Her A Doctor’s Appointment Without Asking

woman arguing with her mother

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woman arguing with her mother

Shutterstock

How old is too old for someone’s parents to still be all up in their business?

Well, I know everyone is different, but if I found out my mommy was going behind my back when I was in my late thirties and making doctor appointments for me without my permission, I don’t think I’d be too happy about it.

And neither is the woman who wrote this story!

Check out what she had to say about how her mom is getting way too involved in her life.

AITA for telling my mother to stop interfering in my medical care?

“I’m 37F and have a difficult relationship with my mother, 63F.

She has a strong “professional victim” streak.

Her mom sounds pretty manipulative.

If I set a boundary, it quickly becomes “everyone treats me badly” or “sorry for caring.” Her own mother does the same to her, and I’m trying hard not to continue that pattern myself.

She also still treats me like I can’t manage my own life, even though I’ve been largely independent since I was 15, fully independent since 19, and have worked steadily ever since, and I have a five-year-old son.

My older brother, on the other hand, has been financially supported and managed by her for most of his adult life, yet somehow she treats us both like we need supervising.

Less than two years ago, my mother married a man after knowing him for about four months.

Yowza…

I barely knew him then, I consider him a textbook narcissist, and I’ve met his family only once. I do not consider them my family or people I’m comfortable sharing private information with.

In mid-August, my mother noticed a patch on my leg. I explained that I have similar patches all over my body, they’ve been spreading for months, I’ve already seen three doctors, my blood tests are normal, and I’m waiting for a specialist appointment in early October.

She asked to take a photo because her husband’s daughter-in-law, “Jane,” is a nurse and might be able to ask around. I reluctantly agreed.

Jane later said she might be able to arrange an earlier dermatology appointment. I didn’t respond. I assumed I’d be given contact details and could decide for myself.

These folks don’t know how to mind their own business!

Instead, I suddenly received a message saying I had an appointment on September 1 at 11 am. Nobody asked if I wanted it, whether the time worked, or even told me they were arranging it.

Then I found out the doctor was Jane’s aunt.

That made it feel less like a favor and more like my medical information was being passed around a family network I barely know.

I asked for the doctor’s phone number so I could explain the situation myself and probably cancel. Jane refused, saying she wanted to “respect the doctor’s privacy” and that the doctor could give me her number herself if she wanted to.

That was the final straw.

Wow!

Apparently the doctor’s privacy mattered, but mine didn’t while my photo, medical issue and appointment were being discussed and arranged without me.

I told my mother that if Jane arranged the appointment, Jane could cancel it, and that if they cared so much about privacy, they should stop interfering with mine.

My mother replied: “We were only trying to help. You could have said you didn’t want it. Sorry for caring, I guess.”

I understand they probably meant well, but I agreed to one photo being shown to a nurse for an opinion. I did not agree to relatives I barely know arranging my healthcare for me.

AITA for thinking this crossed a line?”

Reddit users shared their thoughts.

This reader said she’s NTA.

Another person weighed in.

This individual shared their thoughts.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a sister who feels badly about unknowingly encouraging her younger brother to play with bullies.

And this person said they all SUCK.

This is out of control!

And it’s obvious she’s being treated like a little kid by her mom.

Outrageous!

She needs to set some firm boundaries with her mom immediately.

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