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Building financial security after childhood poverty can make protecting it feel deeply personal.

Generosity becomes complicated when a struggling friend views someone’s empty property as free housing.

This young man offered a rental arrangement, but his unemployed friend expected open-ended accommodation without payment.

Helping hands can quickly become permanent leases.

AITA for not letting my friend stay in my second property?

I (27M) come from poverty – like, bad poverty.

Myself, my parents and two sisters grew up in a studio apartment barely surviving and it was horrible.

I loved my family, but I hated my living situation.

Because I found it so hard at home, I threw myself into my studies.

I was in every extra curricular and ended up doing really well in school because of how much time I spent there studying and doing extra credit etc.

His hard work paid off.

Thankfully, this got me a full ride to the college of my dreams and my family were really proud of me.

I did great at college and enjoyed having my own space in the dorms.

I left and went straight into work – I saved a lot of money, made good investments and was frugal which now means I’m financially stable and have a really sweet house with my girlfriend (21F) as well as helping my parents and sister out.

He recently decided to try being a landlord.

Recently, we decided to branch out into owning and renting properties and bought a neat little apartment near where my friend, who we’ll call P (34M), is based.

P recently found himself homeless after falling short on rent a few too many times. He’s been couch surfing and it’s only gotten worse since he lost his job for failing a drug test.

He found out through another friend of ours that me and my girlfriend got this apartment and has been blowing up my phone non stop about wondering if he could stay in it.

I called him back last night and said that I was happy to rent it to him, but that he couldn’t live there rent-free as it just wouldn’t be sustainable for me.

He feels conflicted about what to do.

He called me an AH and said I made more than enough money for him to stay there just until he was back on his feet.

I feel bad because I know this could help him, but I also don’t trust him.

His last apartment was a wreck, and even if I was to rent it to him – what’s to say he pays it?

My girlfriend thinks we should let him stay there for a bit until he at least has a job, but I don’t trust him to hold his end of the bargain and only stay there short-term as he has a reputation for being given an inch and taking a mile.

AITA?

Letting his friend stay there rent free would be enabling him not helping him.

When his friend would inevitably refuse to move out, it would also probably be the end of their friendship.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person wouldn’t let the friend move in even if he says he’ll pay.

Here’s the perspective of another person who owns rental properties.

Here’s a suggestion of what he should tell his girlfriend.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an artist who made sure to leave the walls of her home blank and boring before moving out, even though they were covered with gorgeous murals before then.

Nobody thinks he should let the friend move in.

This man is not wrong to distrust a friend who repeatedly missed rent, lost his job, and damaged his previous apartment.

A formal lease, firm payment plan, or no arrangement at all would be safer than a vague promise to leave someday.

His friend spotted a second property and immediately called dibs on the charity package.