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Making decisions for your future is never easy!
This girl shares how she feels suffocated in her hometown and wishes to leave right away.
Check out the full story.
WIBTA if I moved countries without telling my parents?
I (19F) am graduating high school in 32 days.
I live in a very conservative country in which being queer is consistently frowned upon. Because of the stigma surrounding queer people, I have always felt repressed, silenced and hated.
She shares certain experiences…
I have never once been able to fully express myself or my identity in any way whatsoever, and it is absolutely suffocating. My entire childhood was spent aching to leave and never ever come back.
I have been hate-crimed, abused and bullied for most of my life. Long story short: I need out.
My plan was to leave the country by going to university overseas, but my family is lower class and they struggle financially, so they cannot afford to help me pay any university tuition.
I applied to several schools and scholarships, and only have two more scholarships left to hear back from. Nothing else came through, and my chances of being awarded the remaining scholarships are realistically low.
Things have always been rough with her…
The scholarships alone would also not be enough, and I would still need a loan for housing and living costs. All of that would add up to a lot of debt that would be difficult to pay.
My parents are supportive of my dreams, but they are unrealistically optimistic. Their mindset is that if my scholarships don’t work out, then money will somehow come.
No matter how much I try to communicate to them, they don’t understand the urgency I feel in terms of getting out. They don’t understand that the longer I stay here, the more pain I am in.
I have an American citizenship, but because I’ve never lived in the US, college there would still require me to pay out-of-state tuition, which is entirely unaffordable.
She knows her plans won’t work out that easily…
I have some funds saved from a few odd jobs (roughly 1500 USD), which would allow me to buy a one-way plane ticket to Portland and the necessary living supplies.
I have an aunt that lives there who has agreed to help me settle in if I move in near her, so I wouldn’t be entirely alone.
She also has resources for me to get quick service jobs, since she’s a bartender and went through a similar job-finding experience when she first moved.
It would be difficult, but I know that I CAN leave if I make that choice.
This is where it gets tricky…
The problem is, I’m afraid of hurting my family. They have done a lot of work to help me get to university, but their refusal to consider the actual chances of me being able to go is frustrating.
I have told them that me going to the US to work is a backup plan I’m considering, but they always brush it off as if I’m joking. I can’t convince them that I’m serious.
I don’t want to betray them and make them feel as though I’m leaving them, or that I’m ungrateful for what they’ve done for me.
She’s not sure what to do next…
I know that they want the best possible opportunities for me, but we just don’t have the funds, and I don’t think it’s as possible as they insist it is.
The truth is, it’s been nineteen years of hell. I am DONE.
I need out, but it would take an insane amount of planning, and I could hurt my family in the process. WIBTA?
Ouch! She does sound like she’s hurting a lot!
Let’s find out if the Reddit community could guide this girl with her plans.
This user thinks there might be a way to get college without paying much for it.
This user suggests not coming to the US as of now…
This user thinks the US might be a good option than the hometown.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman whose family says she’s selfish for not wanting strangers living in her trailer.
This user suggests moving to America for better opportunities…
This user suggests going to Portland for college.
Somebody needs to make a move!