How Would You React To Being Expected To Buy Your Own Dinner At A Wedding?

Trisha Leigh

2 years ago

I can’t tell from the comments whether or not this story takes place in the US, and I feel like that could be an important piece of the puzzle – because I have never heard of such a thing here.

OP was invited to a wedding and made sure to ask the bride ahead of time whether or not there would be any costs for the invited guests. The bride said no.

Hi, I’m F25.

Recently, my colleague (F31) invited me to her wedding, which happened yesterday. I was super excited and happy for her.

Just in case, I asked her if there was any guest fees – she said “No, you don’t need to pay me anything”.

The day of the wedding was going fine, until they got to the reception and OP received a menu with (quite expensive) prices listed on it.

On the day itself, everything went well until it the reception (dinner time). To my shock, I was presented with a wedding menu that had prices on it. (For example: Steak —- $50) Everything was ridiculously expensive, including the vegetarian options.

At first, I wanted to question her because well, she lied to me that I didn’t have to pay for anything. But it was her wedding and I didn’t want to spoil her day by embarrassing her in front of everyone.

However, the only other option was to simply not eat, as I didn’t bring enough money for both a meal and a ride back. But this was completely unfavourable as I had skipped my lunch to ‘save space’ for the wedding meal and was pretty hungry.

She decided to go to McDonald’s instead, and told the bride she would be right back.

That part was a mistake, because the bride got upset and accused OP of being cheap. Then OP got mad and accused the bride of lying.

Suddenly, I remembered that I saw a McDonald’s about five minutes away from the hotel. As tactfully as I could, I asked the bride if I could make a quick stop to McDonald’s as I didn’t bring enough money for the reception meal. I said that I’d be back in time for the gift ceremony and cake.

I thought she’d agree, but to my horror – she got really upset. She said that she put in so much effort to get this “Michelin-star restaurant service” yet I still wasn’t happy. That I was trying to bring her down by saying that I’d rather eat McDonald’s.

Alarmed, I said that I didn’t mean it that way – I just didn’t have the cash for it. She then scoffed, saying – “Who’s fault is that?”

Although I was trying to keep in my anger, those words really pissed me off, so I told her “You were the one who lied that I didn’t need to pay anything!”

Things escalated to the point that a scene was made and one could make the argument that the bride’s happiness was dampened on her day.

Getting angry as well, she replied: “What I meant was there is no attendance fee! You literally assumed that you’d get a free five-course dinner. Wow, you’re cheaper than I thought!” With a glare, she asked me to leave her wedding. I did, struckdumb and rather hurt.

(…And on my way home, I grabbed a Big Mac lol)

The other people in OP’s life all think she was the jerk to rain on the bride’s parade, but was she?

Back at home, I told my boyfriend everything and asked if I was an asshole. He thought it was a funny story but said I was an AH – if I didn’t have the money I could always pay her back later. In his exact words, he said “You chose the wrong time to be stingy”.

My other friends agree as well, saying that it was not tactful of me for doing that at the wedding – and although she lied, I should have just brushed it off instead of dampening her happy spirits.

After hearing their opinions, I felt quite guilty and embarrassed. However, that one little part of me still thinks that it’s justified because 1) she lied to me, and 2) publicly humiliated me.

Please help me out. AITA?

Let’s hear what Reddit has to say?

Well, this person says you can’t expect people to go without options, especially when the extra costs are a surprise.