Sharing food is one of those things that people are really divided on, because, you know…food.
That said, most of us are more than willing to share with the people we love or even strangers, honestly, if they seem hungry enough.
OP explains some food grab-bag system they have going on in NYC right now, where you can pay a third of the price to get a surprise bag of food at the end of the night in the hopes that less will go to waste.
My girlfriend (25F) and I (29M) live in NYC and there’s a popular app where you buy leftover restaurant food. Restaurants advertise “surprise bags” at a reduced price in order to reduce food waste.
The customer doesn’t know what they’re getting until they pick the food up, but the cost at least 3x lower than the normal menu price. (EG if an entree is usually $24, the restaurant is allowed to charge $8 at most for it.)
These are hit or miss – sometimes you get exactly what you want at a greatly reduced price, but sometimes you get something that you otherwise wouldn’t have picked from the menu.
On the night in question he grabbed one from a BBQ place, and after texting his girlfriend to ask what she wanted, picked up one for her from an Indian joint.
I ordered a surprise bag from a barbecue place that I was picking up on the way home yesterday. I texted my girlfriend asking if she wanted one but she said no, she wasn’t in the mood for barbecue.
However, there was an indian restaurant right next door that also had surprise bags available on the app, so she ordered one of them.
The barbecue was $12 and the indian food was $10.
When they opened their bags, his was full of yummy goodness. She, however, wasn’t excited about hers at all.
When I get home I unpack the meals to see what we got. I was psyched about my bag.
Since I paid $12 I knew the value had to be at least $36, but honestly the platter looked a lot more expensive. This was a hit. (Keep in mind that we live in the west village, which is the most expensive neighborhood in the most expensive city in the US, so $36 for one meal is pretty typical.)
There were burnt ends, ribs, pulled pork, baked beans, potato salad, bread, onions, and pickles.
My girlfriend, however, was less lucky. Her surprise bag only had 6 different types of soup, half of them being variations on cauliflower soup.
She was disappointed to say the least.
OP told her no when she asked to share his, stating that he had offered to get her one but she said no.
She asked if we should share my barbecue and I said no, i’m hungry.
I offered to buy you some already and you said no, so I’m going to devour it.
She got mad and called me the a**hole. I told her if she didn’t want soup she should have ordered something specifically instead of using the surprise bag app.
He told her to order from an app or go down to the bodega and offered to assist her with either of these options, since he has more cash and also she has a broken leg.
I then told her to just order something off a food delivery app. She said she didn’t want to spend the money (another bit of context is I make a lot more money than her and pay all of our rent, I know she’s running a bit of a lean financial picture right now.)
I then tell her that if she doesn’t want to pay for delivery, I’ll walk to the bodega on our street and can buy her something there. (Another bit of context is that we live on a 4th floor walkup with no elevator and she broke her leg in a car accident a month ago, so it can be tough for her to get around.)
She says she the grill is probably off there and all she wants is a hot meal. I tell her she has soup.
She’s upset with him for not sharing, but he feels justified and even like he went out of his way in offering her options to still get some dinner.
Anyway, she thinks I’m the a**hole. But in my defense:
(1) I offered to buy her barbecue to begin with, which she declined.
(2) she picked out her own food and I grabbed it for her on my way home
(3) when she wasn’t satisfied, I suggested two solutions (either ordering something from an app or going to a bodega)
So, Reddit, AITA?
Let’s see if Reddit agrees.
The top comment says no matter how many people think he’s NTA, that doesn’t mean he’s in any way a considerate partner.
Image Credit: Reddit
This person weighed in to say their spouse would never.
Image Credit: Reddit
And lo and behold, it seems the internet has actually changed someone’s mind.
Image Credit: Reddit
This comment, too, calls him out for his poor behavior.
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Sure, after you’ve dumped them.
Image Credit: Reddit
The bottom line is that this guy seems more intent on being right than being kind.
And that honestly never bodes well.