People make dietary choices for all kinds of reasons. Simple preference, for one, but some people consider the planet or the lives of animals (or human farmers/workers) when choosing what (and what not to) eat.
OP’s wife decided to go vegan for animal rights reasons six years ago. He, too, made the switch to being a vegetarian and agreed to eat vegan at home.
At the time they had a small son, so he naturally ate vegan as well, since his parents provided all of his food.
I am (32M) and my wife is (33F.) We have been married for 8 years and have a 12 yo son together.
About 6 years ago, my wife decided to go vegan. She was sent the documentary Dominion by a vegan friend of hers and ever since has said nonvegan food is “revolting” and refuses to eat it.
After a long conversation I agreed to go vegetarian and be vegan in the house and around her, which she was happy with.
She also decided our son should be vegan, which after seeing a dietician I also agreed with.
Now, he’s 12 and earning some of his own money – which his dad discovered he was using to buy non-vegan (or vegetarian) food.
Things have been fine with this arrangement until a few months ago when I began finding wrappers from nonvegan candy and even burgers from McDonald’s in my sons school bag which he had been buying with chore money.
I had a conversation with my son and he confessed he felt lonely and excluded eating vegan around his friends and that they always had much better candy than he did and it wasn’t fair.
So, he started buying his son the food he wanted while they were alone and on their way to after-school practice, etc.
I decided I didn’t want him spending his pocket money on snacks and throwing out the vegan snacks we actually brought him instead of buying games etc, it made no sense, but I also know the way my wife feels about nonvegan products.
So, I began buying my son what he wanted on our way to football practise instead.
When his wife found out the s*%t hit the fan and now he’s wondering whether or not it was such a betrayal.
Long story short, my wife recently found out what has been going on and completely flipped out. She called me an animal abuse enabler and a few other names and said I was corrupting our son.
Now she is not speaking to me, our son panicked and told her I had bought the snacks for him and he didn’t know they weren’t vegan (I don’t blame him for that, he just doesn’t want to be in trouble with mom).
AITA here?
Reddit is ready to take this one on, I’m sure!
The top comment says the wife needs to think about the damage she might be causing.
This person points out, too, that he’s a bottomless pit.
And this commenter says they might want to check back in with a dietician now that the kiddo is older.
Although this person says that’s not really a concern.
They think it’s time the whole family sat down and had a rational discussion.
I think dad was right here.
That said, mom should be included in future discussions.