We hear a lot of stories on Reddit about parents who are helping their kids out financially. There are, however, situations out there that are the opposite.
OP is one of two children, and she is doing well enough for herself to help her parents pay for things like house repairs or groceries on a monthly basis.
Her brother, according to her, is a deadbeat and everyone but her parents are willing to admit it.
My (f32) brother (35) is trash. He has multiple baby momma’s and is a deadbeat. He also is the apple of my mom’s eye. He can do no wrong and is just misunderstood.
My parents are retired and on a fixed budget. I do well for myself and I help them out. I give them maybe $500 a month to help with groceries and bills.
Every once in a while I will give them extra for an unexpected expense. No questions asked.
One month, her mother asked for $2000 for a repair at the house. OP gave it to her, but when her brother showed up last minute to a destination wedding, she didn’t need her aunt to confirm her mother had given him the money.
My mom asked me for $2,000. I sent it to her. Strangely enough I ran into my brother at a family wedding I had been told he could not afford to attend because it was a destination wedding. Weird.
Funny story he actually missed the wedding because he hooked up with some rando on an excursion and went to their resort. It was our cousin’s wedding and my aunt was mad.
She had to make special arrangements to get him included on the trip since he only got the money last minute. She said my mom shouldn’t have given him the money if he wasn’t even going to show up.
Then she shut up after she saw the look on my face.
When she confronted her parents about it, her mother initially hedged but then admitted they’d given him the money. She told them from then on she wanted receipts because she wasn’t working to support him since he won’t support himself.
I enjoyed the wedding and had a great time.
When I got home I went to see my parents. I asked my mom why she had asked for the $2,000. She lied and said something for the house.
I asked what. She couldn’t say.
I told her what my aunt said. I told her and my father that from now on I wanted receipts for any money I gave them.
I said I have no problem helping them but I do not work my rear off for her to give my money to my loser brother.
Her parents basically said they were adults and she couldn’t treat them that way, so she left.
She started crying and my dad said that they weren’t children and didn’t answer to me.
I agreed and walked out.
They didn’t speak for a few months. OP heard through the grapevine that her parents were struggling to pay for groceries.
I didn’t talk to them for two months.
My aunt called me yesterday and told me that my parents were thinking of going to the food bank since they didn’t have any money.
OP told her aunt she’d recently given them $2k, but her aunt snapped back that she knew they had given the money to her brother.
When OP suggested they get the money from him, her aunt called her a name.
I said I had given them $2,000 a couple of months ago and that was more than my family of three spent on food on that time.
She said I knew darn well they had given my money to my brother.
I told her that he should probably pay them back then. She said I was being a b****.
AITA?
Is OP being petty? Should she forgive and forget? Reddit’s weighing in below!
The top comment says it would be good for OP to let them suffer for awhile.
This person says what happened at the wedding is typical, but infuriating.
And this commenter has their doubts that her parents will ever change.
They made the suggestion that OP buy a week’s worth of groceries for two and drop that off, instead.
After all, you can’t eat pride.
I hope OP doesn’t give in.
She was being so kind and they’ve slapped her in the face.