Her Mother-In-Law Keeps Gifting Her Decorations That Aren’t Her Style, But When They Hung An Unwanted Flag Outside Her House She Totally Lost Her Cool

Trisha Leigh

5 months ago

Source: Reddit/AITA

I would venture a guess that most people prefer to have a say in what decorations go in and on their homes.

It’s not really about control, it’s about our spaces making us happy and comfortable.

This woman has dealt with a mother-in-law who doesn’t really get this for years.

In the end, it was a flag that sent her over the edge.

AITA for being rude to my in laws after they hung an American flag on our house

Me (40 F) and my husband (39M) just moved into a new home with our 2 young kids. My in laws and I have always struggled with boundaries, especially my mother in law.

I admit I am a bit particular about home decor and clothing, etc. I have a pretty strong sense of style.

My husband is really go with the flow and doesn’t really have much of a sense of style so defers to me.

Honestly, now that she thinks about it, she sees some red flags.

I probably should have seen it as a red flag that his mom bought his clothes and did his laundry until we moved in together.

To be clear I don’t do either now as he is a grown person and I think he can handle those tasks himself. I mean, I’ll throw his laundry in with mine, but I don’t go out of my way to do those tasks for him.

We both work full time. Anyhow, I digress.

Her mother-in law keeps bringing her things she doesn’t want.

So my mother in law constantly brings things to our house to decorate. She has never had a job and spends most of her time at the mall buying gifts for other people.

I appreciate that she is trying to do a nice thing by giving gifts. But she is constantly bringing things over that we don’t want or need. Every time she comes over she brings gifts. Multiple times a week.

I’ve asked her and my husband has asked her more than 10 times to stop bringing things.

They typically don’t fit my taste and I hate that I end up with a lot of stuff I don’t know what to do with aside from donate.

She won’t stop, no matter how politely they try to decline.

Anyhow at our last home they brought us an American flag to put up on our front porch.

I’m politically very left leaning and feel the flag has become more of a symbol for the right. Maybe I’m wrong. But I’ve heard others express the sentiment too.

At our last house we said thank you and the flag went into storage. They asked why we didn’t put it up a few times and we just kinda said this or that and it never came up again.

This time, she didn’t just bring a gift, she put it up herself.

So back to our new house. They brought one over last night and it was up on my front porch before I even knew what was happening.

I was upset. I’ve been working nonstop to make our new home a lovely place to live functionally and esthetically.

And this was just my breaking point.

Our poster admits she lost her cool.

I want to make decisions about what goes on the facade of my home. My husband seemed to think I was overreacting and my mother in law said you can’t be this upset about a flag.

I said it wasn’t just about the flag. It’s about boundaries.

She said and I quote “ because you have to control everything” as she looked up from reading my 4 year old a book. I’m beyond pissed.

More background: my husband is an on and off again recovering alcoholic. More recently not so recovered. He has been going through detox for the last week while I care for the home and the children. I’m on edge.

So I got pretty snappy and was pretty short and rude. I spent some time in the garage trying to self regulate but couldn’t adequately get myself to stop being a bit of an a******.

So much so that they decided to leave before dinner. Not my finest moment.

I feel guilty that I was being snappy toward them but I also feel like my emotions were trampled all over. Am I crazy?

This woman was probably asking for it honestly.

But let’s hear what Reddit has to say!

One person thinks the MIL is a piece of work.