TwistedSifter

Her Ex Husband Found Out That She Set Up A Savings Account For Their Son, But She Doesn’t Want Him To Contribute

Source: Reddit/AITA/pixabay/Barta4

It’s a great idea for parents to start a savings account for their children.

That way they can set aside money over the years that the child can later use for college, a car, a downpayment on a house or whatever else they may need.

In today’s story, a mom starts a savings account for her son, but when her ex-husband finds out, he’s pretty upset.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA For “hiding” my child’s savings account from my ex and not letting him contribute?

My ex and I divorced 8 years ago.

We have a 12 year old son together.

We don’t discuss finances other than child support.

I don’t care for any money he may or may not give to our child directly.

She started a savings account for her son.

Years ago I opened a savings account for my kid.

I religiously transfer a set amount + child benefit into it every single month.

I also put some “loose change” in there whenever I can.

My kid knows of this account and gets to decide if any monetary gifts from family and friends are to be spent immediately or added to his growing savings.

He doesn’t keep tabs on the account, but has a rough idea of how much he “gets” every month and how much he’s got already.

Her ex wants to know details about her son’s savings account.

My son must’ve told my ex about the account, because my ex approached me about it.

He asked to see the account.

I refused.

He asked to at least know the exact amount (he has a rough idea)

I refused, I don’t see the point.

Her ex asked if he could contribute to the account.

He asked to contribute and become a “co-owner” (as in- the account is to be “from mum and dad”)

I asked if he’d like to make a big initial payment

He doesn’t, as he doesn’t have “that kind of money to just throw into an account nobody can access for years.”

He just wants to join in now and throw in some cash here and there, but the amount that’s already in there is to be overlooked.

I refused.

Her ex thinks the account is going to make him look bad.

He told me that I can only afford that thanks to his child support contributions.

I told him that the child support is his duty and is spent on our son’s current needs, not for him to hold it over my head.

He called me a jerk for not telling him about the account when I first opened it because now he’s “8 years behind” and won’t be able to match it and it will look bad when my kid grows up and only gets my support.

I told him that it’s up to him whether or not he invests in our child’s future, he still has a long time to save something if he so wishes.

He told me I was a jerk for purposefully making him look like a “bad dad” for not having thought of something like this.

She’s conflicted about what to do about the account.

I don’t think it’s fair of him to ask to jump in and claim to have contributed to the savings I’ve worked hard on for years.

But now I wonder if I actually acted like an AH for creating a situation in which I look like the “better” & “more caring” parent?

Should I have told him about it when I first opened the account?

Should I just let him contribute to keep the peace?

The money is going to end up in my son’s account anyway, no matter if he receives payments from 2 savings accounts or just one.

Maybe she is the better parent because she came up with the idea for the account and her ex didn’t.

It’s not her fault she decided to plan for her son’s future and he didn’t.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted…

Her ex might want their son’s money.

Her ex can start his own account.

It’s not too late for him to start an account.

Definitely don’t add the ex to the account.

This is a really good idea…

Her ex doesn’t sound trustworthy.

He can start his own account.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.

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