Names are important—they’re how we connect and show respect. But what happens when someone consistently calls you by the wrong one?

Veronica’s coworker has been calling her “Victoria” for months, and after a particularly frustrating day, she finally told him how much it hurt.

Things got heated and now she’s wondering if her timing was way off, or if she had a right to stand up for herself.

Let’s dive into all the details…

AITA for telling coworker they hurt my feelings calling me wrong name constantly.

My name is Veronica.

I get called Victoria constantly- to the point I know people mean me when they say “hey Victoria.”

People will misread my name even at the dr office etc. I feel like this is why everyone typically calls me V or a shortened version of my name.

She’s usually nice about the mistake, but it’s too much!

I smile and correct people normally when they call me Victoria.

It’s happening so often lately that it’s starting to really get to me.

Four times today alone I was called Victoria. Number of times my actual full name was used? Maybe 1-2 times.

Now she’s being criticized for wanting to be called by her actual name!

One of the biggest culprits is a co worker of 8 months I’m friendly with.

The second time today alone he called me Victoria, I shook my head and told him, “It really hurts my feelings that you can’t remember my name or even to just call me Ronnie or V. Even the employees who’ve been here 2-3 weeks call me Miss V or Ronnie.”

It just got to me, to the point I was genuinely hurt; so I went into the break room to make myself a mug of tea and compose myself. It makes me feel as if I’m so irrelevant my name doesn’t matter.

When I got back to my desk, our other coworker was upset.

They told me “I can’t believe you did that- he just buried his father!” She pointed out that literally no one in the office calls her by her real name- true but it’s cute derivatives of her actual name- like Hannie Bananie.

Does she have to accept being called by the wrong name?

As someone who’s lost a parent I definitely understand mourning, however it’s been a month since the funeral.

The guy I got upset with was giving me the stink eye the rest of the day.

I was blunt and impatient when I spoke to him, but I didn’t raise my voice at all.

When I told my husband he told me I was wrong and should let it go, since half the time I’m called my pen name anyway (I am never actually called by my pen name ftr and never IRL. Just online).

AITA because he just lost his dad and use a pen name online?

If she’s supposed to consider his feelings, he should be considerate of her feelings too.

Reddit thinks this was completely justified.

Being bad with names means they just need to work harder to remember it.

It’s been 8 months after all!

Maybe she just needs a silly name tag…

Grief, tea, and identity—just another day in office politics.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.