Some families can be really exhausting to be around!

Would you agree to go to your in-laws’ house with your spouse if you knew your spouse would just sit in a chair the whole time while you would be expected to help out and look after the kids?

This woman shares why she didn’t want to go to her in-laws’ house and how things got bad afterwards.

Check out the full story!

AITA for not going to my in laws barbecue upsetting my in laws and husband?

My husband told me two days ago that my In laws were hosting a barbecue.

Now so have a bit of anxiety about visiting them. Let’s just say it’s not a pleasant experience.

She’s been a little reserved around her in-laws…

I’m expected to play the silent role and help out, manage our children a every need and make conversation, whilst he sits on the sofa the whole time like a guest.

I’m an extrovert and he’s an enabled introvert so no one questions him not making effort to talk to his own parents or family and the pressure is on me to fill that gap.

There’s also bad history with his parents.

This is where it gets bad!

We’re all civil these days but I still don’t enjoy going.

Anyway I told him yesterday morning I wasn’t sure about going and he was instantly mad.

He went back to normal soon after and I thought he’d accepted it.

15 minutes before he was due to leave with the kids.. after I finished getting them ready be asks if I’m going.

I told him I wasn’t.

He didn’t take it well!

That made him angry making comments such as how we never go anywhere as a married couple. Which is hilarious to me since he rarely acts married when we see his family and does his own thing.

He started telling me that if I didn’t go then the trip to another city is cancelled.

I’m due to go at the end of the month as a family to see my friend but also his sister lives in the same city.

I told him I didn’t appreciate the threat and he denied that’s what it was.

He was due to leave soon and I told him even if I wanted to go I know he wouldn’t wait for me to get ready now. That if he felt this strongly he could have told me in the morning. When they got back he wasn’t taking to me.

It got WORSE!

Our children told me it was essentially like a mini anniversary party for my in laws who had invited guests and cut cake.

I’m guessing they were furious their dil didn’t come as that looks bad for their perfect family Image.

For some reason he chose to leave these details out.

For two days he’s not talking and refusing to eat my food too.

She’s so done with it!

In the past I would have begged him to out of guilt but I’m tired of this cycle. T

here’s still a part of me who wonders if I should have been a bigger person and gone.

It’s hard because he struggles to express his feelings as an avoidant and I’ve tried to be patient but I fear I’m losing that patience and it’s making me resentful.

His parents either lash out or shut down and he’s just like them in that way whereas I love talking things out so there’s a mismatch there.

It seems that he has trouble communicating.

He’s emotionally unavailable which can get lonely too.

To be fair he does enjoy actually enjoy barbecuing so it’s the one time he’ll join in something but it’s still emotionally draining for me to go.

I’ve been counselling long ago but he refused.

My in laws were overly involved and controlling for years. He never could speak up for himself or me. To him it was normal. So they learned to be civil in order to not push him away.

I was able to pretend and be civil but it’s become harder recently although I’m not sure why.

She’s questioning her marriage!

We have been married 10 years, 6 of them of me being a sahm.

My biggest fear is 50/50 custody and his toxic family have unfiltered access to our kids and brainwashing them like they did him.

OUCH! That sounds daunting.

Perhaps she could suggest marriage counseling one more time?

Let’s find out what people on Reddit think about this story.

This user thinks she married the wrong guy.

This user understand why she decided not to go to the BBQ.

This person shares some words of wisdom!

This user has some important questions for her.

This user is surprised how men like these get wives!

He’s being really unreasonable.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.