After eight years of co-parenting with shared custody, one mom thought the boundaries were clear, until she found out her kids were being required to call their dad’s longtime girlfriend “mom” while at his house.

The girlfriend doesn’t attend school events, doctor appointments, or handle any parental responsibilities, yet the title is suddenly being enforced. When mom objects, she’s met with silence…and anger.

Read on for the story.

AITA for not wanting my kids to call their dad’s girlfriend “mom”?

I share 50/50 custody of my children with their father but I have all decision making regarding education, and medical with very little or no involvement from him. My children are 9 and 11 years old. Their dad and I split up 8 years ago. He started dating his girlfriend 5 years ago and just recently bought a house.

This past weekend I found out they require the kids (she has 2 of her own around the same ages) to call him dad and her mom when they’re at their house.

I have only spoken to my ex’s girlfriend a handful of times in the 5 years they’ve been together. They don’t attend any doctors appointments or school events, no birthday parties or even help with things like hot lunches, sports, basic needs like shopping.

That all lands on me. Which I’m OK with! But to hear they are telling my kids that they have to call his girlfriend “mom” was a hard pill to swallow.

Not cool.

I reached out to both my, ex and his girlfriend, through text explaining how I don’t want that happening and how I find it disrespectful and to please support my decision on it. I never heard back from either of them.

Last night when i was passing the kids over for his time I asked him if he received my text and if he’s going to support my decision and he got angry and said “when you have a boyfriend for longer than 5 years, you’ll understand” (I’m single by choice).

I said no, that’s not how it works. I said she’s not their mom, doesn’t do any mom duties for our kids and that decision should be between us, not her.

Nope nope nope.

He said “it’s her choice” and stormed off.

My eldest child can’t stand the g/f and said they will never and doesn’t call her mom. My youngest avoids conflict and is neutral to the g/f. No strong feelings either way. Both get upset when having to go to their dad’s. Neither see the g/f as their mom. It’s just forced when they are at their house.

AITA??

With one child outright refusing and the other complying only to avoid conflict, Reddit has opinions. Is this a harmless blended-family move, or a massive overstep?

This person says absolutely NTA.

This person agrees.

And this person also says NTA…not something you can force!

You don’t earn the title “mom” by moving in…you earn it by being one.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.