When extended family needs some help, it is generally good to assist them if you can, but only if you can do it without causing your immediate family problems.

What would you do if your fiancée’s parents were having money problems and their home was getting foreclosed upon, so they asked you to pay it off for them?

That is what happened to the guy in this story, and while he technically has the money to do it, it would put him in a more risky financial position, so he refused and now his fiancée is upset.

AITAH for refusing to pay off my pregnant fiancée’s parents’ mortgage, when they are under the threat of foreclosure, when I could “easily” afford to do so?

About two years ago, I (31M) met my fiancée (26F). We have a baby on the way. The due date is in May.

He seems to be doing well for himself.

I also have a ten year old son from a previous relationship. I am a professional musician. My band has a sizable local/regional following.

I also privately teach different instruments to mostly children and do music production for some significantly bigger musicians/bands.

Why haven’t they been paying their mortgage.

About three weeks ago, my fiancée got a call from her mother. My fiancée is the oldest of three and her younger siblings are in college.

Her mom informed her that they received a letter that the “acceleration clause” was being invoked on their mortgage due to months of non-payment and that if they do not pay it off by late February, the house would be foreclosed on.

It seems like they are constantly making bad financial choices.

The house had belonged to my fiancée’s grandmother before it was inherited by my fiancée’s parents about 15 years ago when her grandmother died.

The house was paid off, but they took out a mortgage on it because they needed the money.

He has the money, but that is still a huge ask.

My fiancée lived in the house since she was two years old. My fiancée has asked me to use my savings to pay off the house. It would be about 15% of my savings to do so.

I have a sizeable amount of savings. Despite my parents not wanting me to go into music, or at least wait until I graduated college, I went into the music industry full-time from the time I graduated high school.

He has gotten very lucky, so far.

It has largely worked out for me. But, knowing the ebbs and flows of the industry, and especially with having a kid so young, I have been very vigilant about savings.

Having a substantial savings account is important to me given my kids (have one, have one on the way, and want to potentially have a third) because I want to be able to pay for college and help them buy a house (things my parents could not dream of doing).

He seems to have a very good plan for his money.

Also, you never know when times are going to be lean as a musician. This is why I am hesitant to want to pay off their mortgage. Additionally, I am concerned about setting the precedent that I bailout the family.

My fiancée is quite upset about the whole situation. She says we would not be hurting at all if I pay it off and I have no reason to think that I will not continue to make the amount of money I have made in the last couple of years.

How much money he has doesn’t mean her parents should get it.

If anything, there is a good chance it will go up.

She sees it as I could “easily” pay it but I am refusing to do so. I see it as protecting our long-term financial stability.

They won’t be left homeless.

If a foreclosure happens, her parents will get the equity they have in the house and be able to afford a different place.

While I know she is emotionally attached to that particular house, I do not think it is wise to sacrifice our financial stability for that reason alone.

This really is the main point right here.

Her parents need to be in a place that they can afford.

AITA?

They aren’t even married, there is no way that he should consider paying off that mortgage at this point, or likely ever.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

Exactly, why should he bail them out?

Her parents have a history of bad money management.

This commenter makes a great point.

Maybe his fiancée can pay for it.

This person thinks he needs a prenup.

Keep your money out of the hands of this irresponsible family.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.