Generosity without expectation is a beautiful idea, but it’s hard to actually live up to.

When a woman who had spent years as the most attentive aunt in the family watched the holiday season pass without a single sibling asking what her own child might want, she felt a resentment that had been creeping in for years.

Keep reading for the full story.

AIO for being hurt that my siblings don’t give presents to my teen?

For a long time, my husband and I were the doting, childless uncle and aunt.

We had their pictures — photos and artwork — up in our house, we traveled to visit them, and we never missed sending them a carefully chosen present for their birthday, Christmas (husband’s side), or Hanukkah (my side).

Even when they grew older, the couple never stopped their support.

We took some of them on trips and, as they grew up, never missed a Bat Mitzvah or wedding.

When our siblings were short on money, we paid for extras for their children. We never thought of reciprocation.

We didn’t know if we would have children, and we enjoyed every interaction with our niblings.

So finally, they chose to have a child of their own — and there’s qite an age gap between the cousins.

We eventually had a child of our own, half a generation off from the rest of the family.

Our child “Jay” (they/them) is 15. Their oldest cousins are 30 and starting to have children of their own.

At first, it seemed their relatives repaid their generosity.

My husband’s younger sister is as loving to our child as we were — and continue to be — toward our niblings, and his other siblings always send birthday and Christmas presents.

But this most recent year, somethingw as different.

Usually I hear from at least some of my siblings shortly before Hanukkah asking what Jay would like. This year, nothing.

They don’t have a close relationship with Jay, partly because Jay is autistic and finds travel and video calls difficult. Two of my niblings are also neurodivergent.

Jay has other barriers too.

Jay has ongoing health problems that affect their and our quality of life, which probably makes me feel more in need of support from my siblings.

I’m close with two of them and speak with them a few times a month — usually when they need to vent about something.

Now the couple is starting to feel a little slighted by their relatives.

AIO for being hurt that none of them has sent or spoken about a Hanukkah present for Jay?

My siblings are not short on money or stingy, just thoughtless.

In moments like these, it can be easy to overthink.

What did Reddit think?

Maybe it’s best to not make too big a deal out of this.

It’s entirely possible their relatives aren’t acting this way out of malice.

As long as Jay himself isn’t bothered, why should they be?

Honesty may just be the best policy here.

She said she wasn’t keeping score, but after 15 years of generosity, it’s hard not to.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.