As you grow up, you should get more independence and your parents should be working to help get you established on your own.

What would you do if your parents got you a new car as a graduation gift, but they left you with the car payment and took the care for a drive when they wanted?

That is what happened to the young lady in this story, so she talked to her parents to try to set boundaries, which made them upset and she wants to keep the peace.

AITA for telling my parents they don’t respect me?

I am an 18 year old girl who has just graduated from high school. Throughout my life my parents have always done a lot for sister and I but its always been in a backwards way.

This isn’t a very healthy way of helping your kids.

They always seem to act as though doing these things for us are a burden and that we know nothing for ourselves. Saying that everything we own is from them, which is true, and that this means nothing is truly ours. I’ve always thought this was weird.

This has come to a apex as of this month, because as stated above I have just recently graduated from high school.

Wow, that’s a very generous gift.

As most parents do, they bought me a graduation gift. The gift was a new car that is honestly a very nice car. I am very appreciative to have it.

Some things that did bother though was that I wasn’t given a heads up about the car and that I would be making the payments for it.

Gifting a car with payments isn’t exactly a gift.

I understand that a down-payment for a car can be expensive so I am grateful they paid that but I am now stuck with my first ever recurring bill that I wasn’t even talked with about first.

I still was happy to have the car and decided to take more shifts at work to pay for it. In all regards the car is now officially mine, or so I thought.

I guess the parents think it is their car too.

Last night my Step-dad decided that he was going to take my car for a joy ride. Simply because he wanted to see how fast it could go.

I was not happy about that as I treat my car with a lot of care, it is so new and I don’t want to damage it. I told him as such and he got upset and went to bed.

It is actually disrespectful to take someone’s car without asking.

Later that night before my mom went to sleep she told me I was disrespectful child and that since the car isn’t in my name I don’t own anything.

She kept repeating that nothing I have is mine and that I don’t have any right to be upset over that.

That’s really rude.

She even pulled my friend in the argument asking is she would tell her mom no if she were to take her car out, which I thought was beyond unnecessary.

I was beyond upset but I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep composed speaking to them face to face so I wrote a message.

Sometimes writing out your thoughts is much more effective.

I detailed how what they did hurt my feeling and that I feel as though they don’t respect me as a growing adult.

I said that they treat me as both a grown adult and as a small child instead of treating me as a young adult I am.

I hope the car had insurance on it before.

I told them to look from the perspective and try to understand how much it hurts to realize I have nothing to call my own.

My mother asked for the cars pink paper today to so she can “be an adult and put it on her insurance”, whatever that means.

It might help to keep the peace, but she needs to start setting boundaries.

I just want to know if I need to apologize for this. I don’t like straining our relationships but I am also tired of not being heard.

AITA.

Let the parents pay for the car.

This commenter says to seek legal advice.

They may have engaged in fraud.

If the car isn’t in her name, she shouldn’t pay for it.

This commenter thinks she should give the car back.

They didn’t buy her a car, they picked a car for her to buy.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a teen who has spent a decade raising her younger siblings, and thinks it’s time to walk away from her family for good.