Being the maid of honor might be more stressful than being the bride.

This woman hesitantly agreed to be her friend’s maid of honor as she was assured it would be a no-pressure role. However, a friend wanted to help with the planning, and she started taking over the role of MOH.

Read the full story below.

Being Maid of Honour is Getting Complicated

I was asked to be the maid of honour at my friend’s wedding. To preface, we have a long history, but we’re at very different places in life, which makes things complicated.

I was somewhat hesitant about it because she is a lot more traditional than I am, and I was worried that I wouldn’t meet her expectations in terms of planning the pre-wedding events.

When she asked me to be her MOH, she told me it would be an “easy, non-traditional role” and that she “doesn’t want a bachelorette party.” She assured me of this several times.

This took the pressure off at the time, but I was always going to plan something for her because I know her well enough, and that’s just what you do!

The bride’s friend suddenly took over.

Fast-forward a couple of months, and suddenly another friend of hers “would love to help out with the bachelorette.”

Mind you, this friend is not even part of the wedding party, and they’ve known each other for almost two years. She took it upon herself to create several vision boards and shopping lists for the event.

She has continued to overstep since then.

She created a group chat, chose the venue, put it on her credit card, and started messaging me personally about her ideas.

I feel like I’ve inadvertently taken a back seat, and now I owe about $700 for the bachelorette on top of what I’ll be paying for my MOH dress and a wedding gift.

The whole thing does not sit right with this maid of honor.

I’m currently in school and the only one in the group who doesn’t have a full-time job.

My friend seems really into the whole thing, and now I’m wondering, why the big speech about being a “non-traditional MOH” if this is what she wanted all along?

Does she not notice that her friend is overstepping? It feels like a competition at this point.

It’s not my day, so I don’t want to make it about me by bringing this up to them. I also don’t want to look like a bratty MOH by putting boundaries on things they clearly want to do.

I’ve heard that being the maid of honour is like the “kiss of death” for many friendships, and I’m starting to see why people think that.

$700 for a bachelorette? Now that’s steep for a student.

Other people in the comments section are weighing in.

This one asks an important question.

Plain and simple.

Some sensible advice from this user.

Another reader chimes in.

This makes sense.

A low-pressure role shouldn’t come with a high-pressure debt.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a bridesmaid who got kicked out after changing her mind too many times.