When you have kids, it’s natural to want to promise them the world. You’d love to buy them all the gifts they want for their birthday. You’d love to present them with a shiny new car once they get their driver’s license. You’d love to take them on vacation every year, or twice a year if they’re lucky.

But sometimes reality strikes, and you have to temper their expectations, since it’s important that they know that they can’t always have everything they want, and you’d never be able to afford it anyway.

Knowing that money isn’t endless is a big part of growing up, and developing financial literacy is an important skill for parents to teach their children. That’s why we let them buy stupid stuff that they’ll only want for ten minutes, why we let them cry when that means they can’t afford the next thing they want, why we’re kind but firm in explaining that money only goes so far. Because when they’re adults in the real world, it’s important to know how to budget, and when to treat themselves too.

But sadly, that is a skill that too many grown adults still do not have. And the parents in this story clearly are amongst those who haven’t learned to be responsible, either with their cash, or with what they promise their kids. Because they’ve set their sights high, and a family vacation is coming around soon. But they’ve realized that they can’t actually afford it, and their answer to this problem is so far beyond the line of what is acceptable that the line isn’t even visible any more.

Read on to find out what happened here.

AITA for making my children pay for their own portion of our family vacation?

We have been planning on going on vacation to Cuba for the Christmas holidays for a week.

It’s pretty pricey during the Christmas holidays, but that’s the only time we can all go.

We have three children (20, female; 15, male; 12, female), and we are making them pay for their own ticket and part of the hotel, since we wouldn’t be financially stable enough to pay for five plane tickets and such.

Yikes! Let’s see how the kids feel about that.

My twelve year old daughter has been complaining that since the other two have jobs and she doesn’t, that it’s not fair.

However we’ve decided to stick firm with it and be equal to them all.

Their other option if they don’t want to pay is staying at grandma’s.

None of the children like this idea.

My daughter has savings which are just enough to cover the vacation, but she also wants to save up for a phone.

My other two children aren’t happy that they have to pay for their own, but they are willing to since we’d be going to Cuba.

Are we wrong for making them pay? I feel like most families don’t make their children pay for their own tickets but since we all really want to go my wife and I think it’s the best option.

AITA?

There is no way to look at this in which the parents aren’t completely in the wrong here.

If you can’t afford to go on a family vacation, then don’t go on a family vacation. And certainly don’t dangle a trip to Cuba in front of your kids and then later down the line let them know that there are strings attached.

Particularly when those strings involve them subsidizing the whole thing.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an employee who wasn’t keen on contributing more to a coworker’s gift than originally planned.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit made of this.

This person agreed that the parents were being really selfish.

While others thought that rather than charging the kids, they should simply skip the promised vacation.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought that the parents were being financially irresponsible and really cruel to their kids.

Is this rage bait, or do these parents seriously think that expecting their twelve year old child to subsidize a family vacation is an okay thing to do? Because spoiler alert: it’s not. And if you can’t afford to take your family to Cuba, you simply do not take them to Cuba. Perhaps you save up and take them to Cuba next year. But you certainly don’t drain the savings of a pre-teen in order to take the trip that you selfishly want to take.

Sure, there is an argument for allowing the adult child to pay their way, especially if they have a full time income, but two of these children are underage and literally that: children. There is no way they should be forking out for these adult expenses. Just because their parents can’t handle their own finances or are being irresponsible in choosing something they can’t afford, that shouldn’t be having negative consequences on their own bank balances.

Because, to say it again, loud and clear, these are children. And children do not pay for their own vacations – giving them that ultimatum and forcing them to spend their money a certain way isn’t just mean, it’s financially abusive. After all, parents hold a certain level of power and influence over their kids, and in telling them how to spend their money, they clearly know and are exercising that power. This is absolutely appalling parenting, and you really have to feel sorry for those kids.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a mom who homeschooled during the day and worked at night, only to have her employer try to change her schedule.