Source: Pexels/Reddit

In a free society, people should be able to live and practice what they choose so long as everyone else around them is respected. Though some people have an easier time with this idea than others.

How would you handle a nosy friend that repeatedly pries into your own personal customs? One woman recently shared her uncomfortable situation like this with Reddit. Here’s what happened.

AITA for not showing a friend my hair?

I’ve known this girl for some time now since we’re in a learning course together.

We get along well, not super close or anything but spend quite a bit of time together when our schedules overlap.

I wear a hijab and she’s also muslim (but she doesn’t).

Everyone is entitled to their own self-expression in that way.

Some time ago, the topic went to hair and she talked about her own, she asked what mine was like which caught me off guard since no one has ever asked me that.

I gave a vague response for the sake of it so I didn’t make her feel awkward.

Something that made it a bit uncomfortable for me was that she asked a little loudly, while knowing our male classmates were around.

Sounds like this girl isn’t great at reading the room.

Despite my answer, she asked me again if she could see it, and I said maybe some other time not to hurt her feelings.

Only after this day, it became somewhat of a regular thing that she will ask me about what my hair looks like, ask if I have a picture I can show to her, or try to guess my hair color/texture.

I remember one time, I had some strands out, and she pointed it out and said “Aha, I saw it!”, again a little loudly while male acquaintances were nearby.

This is certainly bizarre behavior.

All of these things come a little unprompted/entirely randomly in conversation as our talks don’t usually revolve around hair, self-care or fashion at all.

In all these instances, I do my best to brush it off in a polite manner or switch the conversation topic, but I can see she gets a little sad, and I end up feeling really bad about it.

Sometimes, unconsciously, I make a sort of surprised or uncomfortable expression the moment she asks me about it, which could upset her and that makes me feel bad too.

Sure, but that doesn’t mean she’s not entitled to her own body.

I sometimes feel I’ve also rejected her request a bit rudely too in the heat of the moment, such as saying “I’ll only show you if I want to”, which makes me feel worse.

The thing is I really doubt she has any ill intentions, she is a very sweet, genuine person.

Potentially annoying, however.

She often helps me out with things and, although it’s reciprocated, I feel like I owe her something.

At the same time, I don’t want to show her or anyone in my course, but by doing that, I feel like I’m somehow communicating to her that I don’t trust her enough to do it.

AITA?

Yikes, no one should ever be made to feel this level of self-conscious. Let’s see if the Reddit community could offer any words of wisdom.

The comments were widely surprised by the friend’s behavior.

So much so, that folks from every culture seemed confused.

Though some asked the important questions.

And tried their best to add some nuance.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a group of friends who were denied a townhome lease because they’re not considered a “family.”

One person encouraged starting a dialogue.

But all in all, the same sentiment was shared.

Their next conversation is certainly going to be a hairy one.