If you have children, playdates kind of come with the territory, don’t you think?

I sure thought so!

But I guess this guy’s sister isn’t on the same page as other parents…and he really let her have it!

Did he take things too far?

Let’s see what the heck is going on here…

AITA for telling my sister she was lazy for banning playdates?

“I (40m) was on the phone with my sister (35f).

I’m childfree by choice she had two daughters (12f and 4f).

She was venting to me about how playdates were getting to be a “pain in the ***” because 4 year old wants “in” on big sisters playdates, and she can’t stand the “whining and crying” that ensues when 4 year old doesn’t get to “play” with them.

This sounds tricky…

Obviously big sister understandably wants time alone with her friends, my sister thinks her older daughter and her friends getting a “break during little sister’s nap time” is enough and she should let her play with them the rest of the time, because she feels she “shouldn’t have to referee.”

And weird…

She told me she informed her eldest that playdates are banned until she and her sister can “work it out” because she’s “sick of the fighting” and “she’s older and shouldn’t be arguing with a 4 year old.”

I told her this “solution” is leaving her at the mercy of a 4 year old, because a 4 year old can’t “reason” and is unable to see past their own wants, so 12 yr old solution is to give little sister her way or not see her friends and that’s garbage and I told her so.

He told her how he felt.

I said “a playdate is supposed to be an experience for your child, not a break for the parent.”

And I called her lazy and that it’s her job as the parent to teach her 4 year old boundaries, not her 12 year olds to “work it out.”

She said I don’t know what I’m talking about because “I’m not a parent” and I shouldn’t “judge” her.

AITA because I’m a clueless child-free man? Is there something I’m missing here? I know she’s overwhelmed but I feel this is more her job than her 12 year olds.”

Here’s what people had to say on Reddit.

This reader said he’s NTA.

Another person spoke up.

This person said she’s NTA.

Another person said she’s LAZY.

Sounds like these two have some issues to work out.

Good luck to them!

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.