I’m gonna go out on a limb right now and say that these two might want to consider couples counseling…

Because it sounds like they have some serious issues!

But the big question remains…did this woman do anything wrong?

Read her story below and see what you think.

AITA for ruining his birthday?

“My boyfriend’s birthday is this week, and we were going to celebrate in this weekend, just me, him, and his son.

This past Sunday afternoon he randomly mentioned if he should invite a close friend of his over this weekend too, and I said yes, for sure. I asked who else he’d like to invite and he named a few other friends.

He previously didn’t mention anything about wanting to have a house party/ hangout.

I’m pretty sure I was positive and happy to have his friends over (I really am), but I guess I said somethign like “I will just need to clean the house and get everything ready.”

By that I meant cleaning (were renovating the kitchen right now but its usable, just a mess, and the living room is like a work zone/ staging area) figuring out drinks, food, snack, plus baking his cake.

She does a lot around there…

If I had a tone in my voice it wasn’t intentional, but when it comes to home care, I take on 95% of the burden while I also have a full time job and work outside the home just as much as him.

I’ve told him before I need more help around the house but he doesn’t put out. Anyways, he said “we’ll all we really need to do is pickup the tools, and since my son is coming we would need to clean anyways” and I agreed and that was pretty much the end of the conversation as I remember.

Huh?

Yesterday we were having dinner and he just says “I’m not going to invite my friends over because you said it will stress you out”, and to that I said “I never said that”, and again he repeated himself and insisted I did say that.

I told him he really should invite his friends over, that it will be fine, I just need time to clean up the house and get ready to host, and that I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t have a party.

He didn’t say much after that and I just concluded the conversation with “I will clean up the house either way, and I feel like its expected when you host a party to feed the people coming over, but I can just plan bare minimum on that and just get snacks and stuff, so whatever you decide to do we’ll be ready.”

He ignores me the rest of the night and sleep in another room.

What is the deal with this guy…?

Today he’s cold and distant again. I ask him whats wrong over lunch, he says the reaction I had to him saying he wanted his friends over, ruined the opportunity and “I took the fun out of his birthday”, and that I “made him feel like a burden” and its “too late to change anything or invite them,” even though Monday to Tuesday is not much of a difference.

I just said sorry because I was shocked and didn’t know what else to say, and I feel HORRIBLE and that I just ruined his birthday and he won’t have any fun because of me.

And I think this is something that triggers me cause I spiraled and had a melt down, feeling worthless and like I can’t do anything right.

But I don’t spiral or cry where he can see it, I do so when I’m alone. Im wondering now, is he like manipulating me in some way? Did I really do something bad?

I feel horrible but I don’t know if its deserved, or just my trauma response.”

Reddit users shared their thoughts.

This person had a lot to say.

Another reader shared their thoughts.

This Reddit user said she’s NTA.

This reader had a lot to say.

And this person weighed in.

These two are DEFINITELY not on the same page these days…

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