Typically, the oldest sibling in a family has a lot of pressure put on them by their parents and their brothers and sisters.

It’s not fair, but it seems like that’s the way things have worked for generations.

Now, take that knowledge and then apply it to a family where farming is life.

That adds a whole other layer of responsibility and tradition to the equation.

The guy who wrote the story below has put in his time on the family farm, but he’s done fulfilling his obligation as the oldest sibling.

Can you blame him for feeling this way?

We think you’ll probably be on his side after you read what he had to say about this situation.

Get started now.

AITA for not stepping up to take over my dad’s farm even though my siblings expect me to?

“I (39M) am the oldest of four. My siblings are 31M, 29F, and 27M. There’s been a lot of talk lately about what’s going to happen with my parents’ farm.

These kinds of decisions are tough for a family…

Both of my parents are getting older and dealing with health issues. I won’t go into too much detail, but they’re not really able to keep up with the physical work much longer.

The farm has been in our family for years. We grow wheat and take care of several animals, so it’s not something you can just leave unattended.

Growing up, I was the one who spent the most time helping them. Up until I was around 24, I basically put my life on hold to work on the farm. I didn’t pursue a career or education during that time, I just did what needed to be done.

Every person has to branch out on their own at some point, right?

Eventually I realized I needed something for myself too, so I went to college and started trying to figure out what I actually wanted in life.

Over the past couple of years, I’ve been traveling, exploring different cultures, and working remotely. It’s the first time I’ve really felt like I’m living life on my own terms.

The issue is that my siblings all expect me to take over the farm. None of them want to do it themselves. They all have their own lives and careers and say they “can’t,” but at the same time they keep saying it makes the most sense for me to do it.

They’ve even told my parents that I’m the obvious choice since I was the one who stayed the longest and already know how everything works.

It sucks when one child gets everything dropped on them.

Now my parents seem to believe that too. They’ve started saying they always assumed I would take over one day. When I told them I wasn’t sure I wanted that, they seemed really disappointed.

My siblings have been pretty harsh about it. They’ve called me selfish and said I’m turning my back on the family after everything my parents did for me. They also keep bringing up the fact that I already “gave years of my life” to the farm, like that somehow means I owe them even more.

You gotta do what makes you happy!

The thing is, I don’t want that life. I know how demanding it is, and I feel like if I go back to it full time, I’ll end up miserable and resentful. I’ve finally started building a life that feels right for me, and I don’t want to give that up.

At the same time, I feel guilty. My parents have done a lot for me, and I don’t want to let them down, especially considering their situation.

Part of me wonders if I am being selfish for not stepping up when the farm clearly needs someone.”

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman whose family says they support her art career, but they still don’t want to pay her for product.

Reddit users shared their thoughts.

This person offered some advice.

Another Reddit user shared their thoughts.

Another individual spoke up.

This reader said he’s NTA.

And this person weighed in.

You gotta feel for this guy…

He’s spent years putting off his own future to help out with the family farm, but now he’s ready to start living his life for himself.

He genuinely sounds like a decent person from the story he wrote, so let’s hope that he and his family members figure it all out in a way that’s best for all of them.

Good luck to him!

Being the oldest sibling comes with a lot of responsibility…and this guy doesn’t want any of it.