The Kids Were Enjoying Their New Pool—Until A Neighbor Complained About The Noise
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There’s a balancing act every parent with a backyard faces: little kids need room to be loud and have fun, but neighbors also deserve some peace, and one father is currently trying to find that middle ground.
After moving into a new house with plenty of outdoor space for his three kids, he set up an above-ground pool meant to keep the kids entertained while he and his wife tackled the overgrown garden themselves.
So =when a neighbor two doors down complained about the noise, the father apologized instinctively but also pointed out the kids were simply having fun within a fairly reasonable daily window.
Confusingly, the neighbor claimed people on both immediate sides shared the same frustration, yet one of those neighbors, someone he regularly talks to, had never mentioned a single issue.
He was left genuinely unsure whether the noise really was a widespread concern, or one person’s particular sensitivity.
Keep reading for the full dilemma.
AITA for letting kids play in the garden
So I am based in the UK, moved into new house about 8 weeks ago. Bought the house for the big garden and extra bedroom, I have 3 boys (15, 8, 5) and now I am lucky enough to have a house where they all get their own space.
Maintaining this outdoor space has proved to be a big project.
House and garden previously a bit unkept, so we have loads to do.
Because of this we bought one of those above ground pools and managed to fill it up before the hosepipe bans. Idea was kids would be entertained while my wife and I tackled swathes of brambles and uncovered the rest of the garden.
Soon the family runs into some trouble with the neighbors.
Neighbour (next door but one) knocked on my door yesterday to complain about the kids shouting and screaming.
I was a little taken aback, immediately apologised (because I’m British), but I also said it was a difficult ask, they were just having fun.
We had friends over with kids the same age, they’d been in the pool all afternoon (probs 4 30 min stints) from 2pm till last one around 6:30pm.
The neighbor seems to think this is an issue that’s plaguing the rest of the neighborhood too.
He also said my immediate neighbours (both sides) were also struggling with the noise, which I queried, as I speak to both sides. One side thinks maybe, but the other I chat to a lot and I would have thought he would have mentioned it.
Now the homeowner doesn’t know how to proceed.
I am conflicted, I don’t want to cause my neighbours distress, but also I want my kids to be able to use my garden. Kids are never out there late, we’re usually wrapped up by 8pm, and certainly never out there early, pool never gets used before midday.
He’s torn between honoring what his family needs and being a “good neighbor.”
It’s unheated, so kids usually in it for 20 mins at a time max, but longer over last week because it’s been warmer, and also I’ve been looking after my nephew, helping my sister out with childcare.
Anyway, neighbour left happier (I think) after vocalising his grumbles, but now I am trying to work out if we are “that inconsiderate family” everyone hates, or he is just “that guy.”
This is a tough one.
What did Reddit have to say?
Kids are loud — it’s kind of their thing.
It’s important to teach kids to be considerate of their neighbors.
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A doting parent’s perception of the noise may be very different than an outside neighbor’s perception of the noise.
A simple reminder to the kids to just keep it down would likely be more than enough to smooth over this conflict.
If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about neighbors who intentionally tank an open house sale because they want to buy the property themselves.
Kids splashing and shouting in a pool during reasonable daytime hours isn’t inherently inconsiderate, especially with clear boundaries already in place around timing and duration.
At the same time, dismissing the complaint entirely would ignore the inevitable fact that noise perception varies a lot between neighbors, and just because it doesn’t feel excessive from inside the garden doesn’t mean it isn’t grating next door.
The fairest path forward likely isn’t restricting the kids drastically, but being a little more proactive, maybe giving neighbors a quick heads-up on days with extra friends over.
In matters of neighborhood diplomacy, compromise is the name of the game.
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