Sadly, we’ve got yet another wedding conundrum here.

This time, instead of being about not inviting someone, it’s about uninviting yourself.

AITA for planning to skip my brother’s wedding because of his fiancée?

My brother’s fiancée recently invited me to their wedding, which is scheduled for October 2025.

I don’t support their relationship.

She makes most of their decisions, speaks for him constantly, and has isolated him from our family.

Sounds like a typical high control partnership, unfortunately.

A few years ago, I called emergency services during a crisis he was having, and he ended up being hospitalized for a psychiatric evaluation.

That crisis happened after he found out she had cheated on him.

Ever since then, he cut off contact with our family completely.

That falls in line all the more with someone who is manipulative in the extreme.

My family and I have had many negative experiences with her.

She often turns situations around to make them about herself and doesn’t take accountability.

Now, after over three years of silence, he’s reaching out to invite just a few of us to the wedding.

Well, that’s a surprise…

His fiancée asked me directly to come.

I told her I wanted to hear it from him first.

When we finally talked, I told him I want him to be happy and said I’m open to coming.

But deep down, I don’t feel right about it and I’m leaning toward skipping it.

Would I be the [jerk] for not going?

Here’s what that comments made of this:

They all said more of less the same thing:

It’s not going to be fun, but it might be necessary.

Bottom line:

Unfortunately, her invite to you was likely a calculated move, and she’s probably COUNTING on you not showing up so she can further cement in your brother’s head that she’s the reasonable one and you’re all just bitter.

It’s an awful game to find yourself in the midst of.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.