Being the reliable one in the family comes with a big price, one that isn’t often spoken about.

One scholarship student has spent semesters funneling her payouts straight into rent, groceries, and internet for her whole household, rarely keeping anything for herself.

So when an unexpected extra payout landed, she finally bought something just for her: a secondhand phone to replace one that could barely function.

That should have been a small, well-earned moment for all her hard work.

Instead, it became ammunition in a dramatic family argument that left her questioning everything.

You’ll want to keep reading for the full story.

AITA For buying myself a phone from my own scholarship money than supporting my siblings?

I (F23) am the eldest child of four.

Three of us are all in college. I am the only one who landed a scholarship, and every semester I was given my pay out.

It’s a state college, so tuition is free.

So out of nowhere, she suddenly came into a good chunk of change.

Just a year ago, I received a pay out twice that month. I was surprised as well.

I have shared my scholarship with my siblings and even with my mom. The rest was either put toward paying for our apartment, groceries, internet, etc.

So when I received another pay out, I was excited with the extra money.

P.S. we’re not really that poor poor, we can afford what we need.

She knew immediately what she wanted to do with the money.

So when I got the money, I immediately thought of buying a new phone. My old one was lagging, the camera was not good, and I like taking pictures.

So I told them I’m buying a new phone. My mom was adamant at first, but of course it was my money.

After so much thinking, I bought myself a secondhand iPhone.

But soon her siblings had other ideas about what she should have done with it.

Now my brother and I had a fight about my dad buying him a new brand phone, and I requested a new tablet (I can use for school, especially in my field study, my laptop was too big to carry around).

Then he goes on saying why do I need it, blah blah blah, until he brought up that I bought a phone instead of buying what we need in our apartment and paying for our apartment.

I got mad, of course I was offended and hurt. It was my money, don’t I have any rights to buy what I want for once?

She doesn’t understand why she’s being made to feel so guilty about this.

It was the first time that I bought something for myself, and suddenly I felt I was selfish for giving myself a reward?

So what do you guys think?

Her money, her decision.

What did Reddit have to say?

This commenter has mixed feedback.

This commenter raises some concerns about whether this was an appropriate use of the money.

On the other hand, having a working phone in college is important.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a brother who is concerned about the trouble with splitting funeral costs equally between siblings.

Perhaps the next money she receives should be used to move out.

Funding rent, groceries, and internet for an entire household isn’t a small contribution, yet her family is still treating it like one.

This kind of hard work should be the kind of thing that should earn trust, not scrutiny.

Being generous shouldn’t mean forfeiting the right to ever spend on yourself.