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There are good neighbor. There are bad neighbors. And then there are really bad neighbors. I’m talking so bad that you can’t live near them in peace and there’s always drama.

This story is about the really bad kind of neighbors. The police have been called multiple times. One neighbor is upset about noise, and the other paranoid neighbor blames the first neighbor for anything and everything that could go wrong.

It sounds like a nightmare living situation, but neither neighbor wants to move.

Now, they’re headed to mediation with the landlord, and the upstairs neighbor is worried about the meeting.

Let’s read the whole story.

I convinced our landlord for a mediation meeting between my neighbors and I.

There has been an ongoing issue between my neighbors and I since they moved in July 2021.

They were issued an official noise complaint in October, for being loud after quiet hours. They got somewhat quiet for about a month, then started back up again in November.

Since then, I’ve repeatedly asked for my landlord to step in, for some help. In fact, the day of my neighbor calling the cops on 11/30/2021, they specifically blamed me for their car damages.

I felt like the entire time the cops were asking questions, on whether or not I had seen anything, they were saying my neighbor blamed me. “We know you and your neighbor have been having issues.”

This would be so frustrating!

I immediately called my landlord and told her what happened.

She said “I think legally the cops have to tell you if you’re a suspect or not.”

My landlord is dumb. They don’t.

I later got a copy of the police report and I was in fact named as the prime suspect by my neighbor. On car damages that happened in our shared parking lot.

This lady doesn’t even know what I drive. Has black scuff marks on her white car and my car is blue. Insert eye roll

This is weird.

My landlord didn’t speak to my neighbors after the cops came. Dismissed the whole event. So now there is more tension between us neighbors.

Then comes a day when I heard a knocking. I was in the other end of the apartment so I walked over to the front door and no one was there. I then went to my balcony for some fresh air. My balcony faces the parking lot.

The knocking continues and then I see someone leave my stairwell and get into their car. Some blonde lady. IDK who. The odd thing was, this person looked up at me. I’m on the 3rd floor. No one ever looks up in my direction.

Then I see her texting from inside her car and drive off.

But it got weirder.

I didn’t think anything of it. Then I go back inside shortly after, because it’s cold.

This is when I hear my neighbor rustling in her apartment (directly below me). She’s a loud talker and recounts all the steps I just took.

At first I thought her saying “she this” and “she that” was complaining about the lady who just left. Then she said (I don’t know exact quotes. I’m filling in blanks b/c sometimes I can hear only every other word.) “I never hear that B* upstairs move around” (me). But whenever something happens in my apartment, she has to butt her ugly face in it. There was someone knocking on my door, and then I hear her walking to her door. Then my friend (I’m guessing the lady) left and said that B* upstairs was peering over her, watching her. At first I thought it was that B* knocking on my door so I avoided the door. If that B* ever knocks on my door, I’m shanking her A**. If I see her outside in the parking lot, I’m stabbing her.”

Normally I don’t care what she has to say. My ears only really perked up when she was stating a replay of what I had just done minutes ago.

The neighbor sounds paranoid.

I was scared so it led to us calling the cops on each other. That was on 12/7/2021

After this event, I had had enough.

The cops that came the evening of 12/7/2021 said my neighbor was saying she thought I was stalking her. LOL! In the police report from 11/30/2021 she specifically mentions that she’s seen me poking around other tenant’s cars and peaking into other tenant’s patios.

Absolutely not true. She is very paranoid against me. If anything, this feels as if she is watching me as I’m outside, when I sometimes walk my neighborhood. That’s creepy!

The police made a suggestion.

When the police came by that night of 12/7/2021, he asked me “have you talked to your landlord about these concerns?”

I had. On our meeting on that previous Monday, my landlord said to my face that she would do nothing about it. So it escalated.

The cop said “there is someone who is above your landlord and you need to get in contact with them.”

I agreed and I did. I sent corporate all my concerns with my neighbor and how my landlord did little to nothing leading up to this most recent event.

They need to talk this out.

After requesting for it, my landlord agreed to a mediation meeting. It will be my landlord, my female neighbor who has all the issues with me, my landlord’s boss, and myself. (It may also include my neighbor’s boyfriend. Which is actually the root of all my previous noise complaints.)

I’ll admit, I can hear my neighbor whenever she’s on the phone. She puts herself on speaker phone. I don’t need to actively listen, she’s just loud.

Soon after my landlord’s boss called me to hear all my concerns, I’m guessing they called my neighbor. I say this because of the things that were said.

Here are some examples of things that were said.

I have told my landlord about how they run their dishwasher at Midnight, their washing machine at 2am, loud screaming at all hours of the night, etc.

When my landlord’s boss called my neighbor, I guess they discussed this.

I heard my neighbor point blank say she talks to their downstairs neighbors (the first floor. my neighbor is 2nd floor, and I’m on the 3rd.) That she has talked to the first floor neighbors about running their washing machine late at night and it doesn’t bother them. That if another neighbor were to do the same thing “she doesn’t care.”

She kept saying that over and over again when my landlord’s boss was talking to her too, “I don’t care.”

She’s worried about mediation.

This really deters me in thinking this mediation will go smoothly. Or that they’ll even walk into that meeting with an open mind.

I’m thinking of bringing in a copy of the police report to discuss why she is so paranoid against me.

Honestly, I just enjoy the peace and quiet when I’m home alone. As soon as my neighbors come home, they blast their music, then she makes phone calls on speaker phone.

I’ve started to play bag pipe music to drown them out. LOL!

This living situation is the opposite of peaceful.

Oh, after the 12/7/2021 event, my neighbor has now come home and immediately blasts her music and TV to play it so loudly I can hear it word for word.

Since my quiet hours are from 10pm to 8am, one day I vacuumed at 9am. This included me moving furniture etc.

When the office manager called her to set up an appointment for mediation, she complained saying I was “banging all day long.” (It was only in the morning.) That it was making her 3 year old son scared. That she has an emotional support dog and it was frightening her dog.

She forgot to mention anything about vacuuming, only that I had been banging. She loves to play the victim and repeatedly hides behind her child for sympathy.

The drama continues.

Immediately after she got off the phone, she blasted her TV. Banged all the kitchen cabinets (I’m assuming to put dishes away) etc.

I don’t ever complain about daytime noises. I only mention if it’s after 10pm, or in the middle of the night.

Even after the cops left on 11/30/2021, she called a friend on speaker phone and complained about me. Apparently there was no evidence supporting her claim that I vandalized/damaged her car. Instead, she complained to whomever saying how “It’s b/c she doesn’t have kids. People like that are crazy. They act like that b/c they don’t have kids.” (The police report says she’s 22. Their son is 3. They must have been straight out of High School when they got pregnant.)

It would be hard not to be offended.

I’m really offended by this assumption.

I’ve seen/heard of people with and without kids being criminals. Not having a child doesn’t automatically make you a criminal.

Plus, she has no proof. She has her own delusions.

When the 12/7/2021 event happened, she claimed she was scared for her son’s safety and how she’s pregnant right now. I have never gone any where near this woman. I have never interacted with her child. I didn’t even know she was pregnant. I’m just utterly shocked at her paranoia.

She’s worried about the meeting.

So…..in conclusion, what do I say/ not say in this meeting? I don’t think I can mention anything I’ve overheard her saying about me. She already feels like I’m eavesdropping on her. She told the police I’m stalking her.

The police told both her and I on how to file a harassment/ stalker report (basically a restraining order). If I mention anything about what I’ve overhead, especially in a meeting with other people there, she will have enough ammunition to get that report approved by a judge. That’s a concern.

She’s already told my rental manager “I don’t care” when talking about running major appliances late at night.

My manager called me back to confirm a date/time and simply said “I’m asking both of you to not make any loud noises over the weekend.” Also, we are both being offered an out on our leases, with no penalties.

The meeting may not be effective.

I don’t think they’re going to move. I’ve been here for 2 years and don’t plan on moving either. I want to relocate to a renovated unit later on in the year (when we can afford a new deposit).

This meeting may not resolve anything either. I’m also going to be the only one in the meeting. My partner will not be available to attend.

Herself and her boyfriend might be there, and he is the one I have issues with- not her.

As far as my rental manager has said, “If anyone gets disrespectful, the meeting is over.” Good policy.

Any advice?

The neighbor is paranoid, and OP is sick of the noise. The best solution would be for someone to move, but since that’s not going to happen, how should OP approach this meeting?

Let’s see what Reddit suggests.

This is a good idea.

Here’s a similar suggestion.

Maybe the landlord would be willing to make it easier to move. That would be the perfect solution.

I don’t think these two neighbors are ever going to be on good terms, so one of them really needs to leave. I feel bad for whoever moves into OP’s apartment though.

It’s too bad it seems like it’s always the good neighbors who have to move while the bad neighbors go on making everyone else’s lives miserable without consequences.