“I Needed Her Most”: Grieving Woman Reaches Breaking Point Over Best Friend’s Absence
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They say that you find out who your real friends are when the going gets tough…
And, in my experience, it’s true!
It really doesn’t take a whole lot of effort, people.
And this story is a perfect example…
The woman who wrote it is having some conflict with her best friend because she wasn’t there for her when her father passed away.
Take a look at what she had to say about this situation.
AITA called out my best friend for neglecting my grief?
“I (29F) met my ‘best friend’ (29F) in 5th grade, but we got very close after high school.
We spent a lot of time together, shared holidays, birthdays, even lived together for 3 years. We have had relatively no arguments or even heated discussions. Our friendship has always been strong, to the point where we refer to each other as soul mates & “wife”.
We were always there for each other, from breakups to surgeries; so when her adopted mom passed away a few years ago, I dropped everything to comfort my grieving friend.
After we stopped living together, she moved about 40 minutes away. While we didn’t see each other regularly, we still maintained near-daily communication.
This past December, my dad got really sick and fell into a coma.
How sad!
Most of my immediate family dropped everything & left to Mexico, unfortunately I was unable to join them. Within 2 weeks of him falling ill, he passed away. I was heartbroken.
While we weren’t the closest because he tended to be a tad judgmental, my dad was always an important part of my life & we loved each other very much. It was difficult for me to be alone, grieving, & though my friends & family would call to check in, it was depressing.
My “wife” took 4 days to even call me to ask how I was doing, which was hurtful but being that I was glad to speak to her, I let it go. We talked for a bit, then I asked her to come to my house.
I told her I needed her & I wanted to spend a few hours together. She then told me to drive to her house instead, spend the night.
I told her that I definitely wasn’t in the mood to make such a drive and pleaded for her to come instead, after all I just wanted a couple hours of being alone with her, & not to be around her and her boyfriend (nothing against him, I just wanted my best friend!).
Wow…
She said she would see, we left it at that. And that was it. No other calls or texts or anything.
A week goes by, nothing. I was hurt. And alone. (And a little soused) so I messaged her on Snapchat, told her that I was hurt that she didn’t deem my grief important enough to make the drive to come see me for a few hours, & even mentioned how I had dropped everything when her mom passed.
She really let her have it!
I was upset, and tipsy, so I ended it with “thanks for being such a great friend, (expletive)”. She took offense to my message and we went back and forth a little.
The next day I received a notification that she screen-recorded our chat, and all she wrote was “whoops” (like yeah, I’m going to believe you accidentally screen-recorded, but whatever).
The next week, she invited me to her daughter’s drive by birthday party, but since my siblings and mom (who I hadn’t seen in a year since she and my dad left to Mexico) were returning, I informed her I wasn’t going to make it.
I can’t say for sure, but I feel like she took it personally, as though I was doing it to hurt her. We haven’t spoken since, but I’m still mad at her.
So…AITA?”
Check out what readers had to say about this.
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This person said she’s NTA.
Another individual had a lot to say.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a grandson who is tired of driving 5 hours one way to work on his grandparent’s investment property for free.
And this reader weighed in.
Yeah, I’m gonna go ahead and say that her friend is wrong about this one.
It doesn’t take a lot, people!
Just put in the effort and be there when your friends are struggling.
It sounds like her friend wasn’t there for her when she needed her the most…
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