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When it comes to parenting, everyone has different ideas on what qualifies as “strict.”

One single mom moved in with her friend’s family after losing her housing, landing in a home with real structure: chores, screen time limits, and actual car seat rules for kids well under the age most safety guidelines recommend.

What felt like a culture shock for her own two kids was, in reality, just standard parenting practice.

Now, watching her kids struggle to adjust, she’s stuck wondering if the problem is her friend’s rules, or the absence of rules they’d gotten used to at home.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for moving my kids into a house with strict rules

I’m a single parent to 2 kids (5F and 8M).

A few weeks ago, my kids and I moved in with my friend, her husband, and their kids (10F, 7F, 4F, 3F) after my kids’ dad stopped paying child support and I could no longer afford to stay in our house.

She further describes the situation.

My friend moved my daughter into her younger two kids’ room, gave my son her husband’s office, and I’m in the guest room. Both rooms have been set up for the kids.

They’re in between nannies at the moment and are allowing me to use the nanny’s car so I can sell my car to pay off some debt.

But their parenting styles differ greatly.

My friend is a bit more strict than I am, especially in 2 areas: screen time and car seats.

I didn’t really have screen time rules for my kids (I would monitor, but didn’t have set rules about time limits).

My friend only allows screen time for an hour a day on weekends, plus family movie night on Fridays. She also has YouTube blocked on nearly every device in the house, and most video games are banned.

Luckily, there are plenty of other things to do, but that wasn’t where the conflict ended.

She has plenty of toys, there’s a massive swing set in the backyard, they have a membership to an athletic club with 4 pools, and their house is on a lake. We’re a 5 minute walk from the beach.

As for car seats, I had allowed my son to stop using a booster seat, and I let my daughter ride in a high backed booster.

But her friend sees things very differently.

My friend says that while we’re using her car, my son needs to be in a booster and my daughter needs a car seat. She provided the seats.

Her house is more strict than ours overall. All of the kids have chores, and there’s a lot more structure than we’re used to.

Now her kids are having a hard time and it’s causing drama.

The kids, especially my son, are struggling to adjust. They say they hate it here, they hate my friend, and they want to go live with their dad or my parents.

Now her social circle is weighing in.

Some other friends and my family think that if the kids are miserable, I should find some other living arrangement for us and figure out a way to make it work.

I’m not planning to be here for long, hopefully we’ll be on our feet by the end of the summer. I’ve already promised that we’ll be out by October.

She isn’t sure how to proceed.

I think they can survive 3.5 months of stricter rules and routines, but nearly everyone else thinks I should figure out alternate living arrangements to make the kids happy.

AITA for keeping them in a house that they hate living in?

This sounds like a rough situation.

What did Reddit have to say?

Maybe this mother could be learning something from her “strict” friend.

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Maybe some strictness is what this family needs.

This user has a very different idea of what constitutes a “red flag.”

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who finally blew up after years of being treated as the second-best sibling.

Kids famously don’t like rules — it’s not rocket science.

Since when is putting your child in a carseat a “strict” rule?

It’s clear this mother’s children have gotten used to a lack of order in their own house, so it’s no surprise that her friend’s rules felt so foreign to them.

The mother shouldn’t view this as an outright failure. If she’s humble enough, she can take what she’s learned from her friend and start to apply it in her own parenting.

It’s not too late to start turning things around.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.