Doing family favors feels a lot different once you discover the people benefiting from them have been criticizing you behind your back.

One woman babysits her sister-in-law’s kids for free, but after spotting nasty texts, would you keep helping or finally say no?

That discovery leaves her drawing a firm boundary while her husband and in-laws insist she is making too much of it.

See why one weekend babysitting request suddenly came with years of family tension attached.

AITA for refusing to babysit my sister-in-law’s kids after I saw text messages between her and my mother-in-law saying horrible things about me?

I am a 26-year-old woman, and am married to my husband, who is 28.

I don’t have the best relationship with his family, but I have always been civil. I’ve never had a problem with my sister in law (30) but there was always some tension between us.

She asked me two months ago to babysit her children, since she likes going out with her girlfriends on weekends but never got the time because of the kids – and plus, I don’t work weekends.

My husband thought this would be a great way to bond with her kids (a four-year-old girl and a seven-year-old boy), and smooth the tension between me and my sister-in-law.

Let’s see how this arrangement worked out.

I thought a few weekends here and there wouldn’t hurt, but she was also refusing to pay since I’m ‘family’.

I didn’t want to without payment, but I did want make my husband happy and keep the peace because I knew she was going to cause drama in his family if I didn’t, so I said yes.

It wasn’t so bad and the kids are nice and respectful – plus she payed for food.

Then, things suddenly changed.

Fast forward to this weekend, and my sister-in-law was next to me at a family dinner.

I saw a notification on her phone for a conversation between her and my mother-in-law, in which they were talking badly about me, saying stuff like that I’m annoying.

I was shocked because I had been babysitting her kids for free and been very nice to her.

I confronted both of them with my husband, who said it wasn’t a big deal and to drop it, but I was enraged.

Read on to see how the two women reacted.

They both said I had no right to snoop and crossed a line, but eventually they gave a halfhearted apology – but I was still mad at them, and at my husband for not sticking up for me.

My sister-in-law asked me if I could babysit on Sunday, to which I said no and told her I was shocked at the audacity for her even asking.

Now her, my husband, and his family are mad and saying I’m overreacting and blowing things out of proportion.

I think I’m in the right, but my husband isn’t speaking to me and is sleeping in the guest room.

AITA?

This woman has been completely disrespected by her in-laws, it’s no wonder she’s upset.

But the issue here isn’t just the sister-in-law who thinks she can say mean things behind her back but still expects her to take care of her kids.

The real problem is that she has a husband who would rather side with his mom and sister than with his wife.

Let’s see what Reddit had to say about this.

This person agreed that a big part of the problem was her husband.

While others pointed out how toxic the whole family seems.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a friend who is upset they missed out on cheap festival passes due to her pal’s indecision.

And this Redditor offered some firm advice.

The babysitting arrangement already favored the sister-in-law, but insulting the person providing free childcare made the entitlement especially hard to defend.

When the wife finally refused, her husband backed his family instead of acknowledging why she no longer felt generous.

Commenters quickly shifted attention toward him, arguing that the bigger problem was having a spouse who refused to defend her.

Free babysitting disappeared, but apparently basic loyalty had already left the building first.