Pexels/Reddit

Growing up means collecting a few small freedoms, and a bedroom door is usually one of the first.

One college student was raised with a rule that her door stayed open no matter what, and she’s finally ready to ask for a different arrangement.

After all, she’s an adult now, her coursework demands focus, and she’d like to talk to friends without disturbing her siblings.

But when she brought it up, her mother explained that an open door helps her feel connected to her children.

The student loves her mom and has no beef with her, but the explanation left her feeling like she was doing something wrong.

Now she’s asking the internet to weigh in — read on to find out what redditors had to say.

AITA for wanting to have my bedroom door closed

My mother conditioned me growing up to never close my bedroom door for any reason. This was always something that bothered me since I felt more comfortable wanting to have my door closed for various reasons.

She feels very strongly she should be entitled to some degree of privacy.

I’m not saying I want to completely isolate myself and keep my door closed 24/7, but I feel like now that I am legally an adult, I should be treated like one.

I’ve talked to her about it, and she says she likes to “feel connected” to all of her children, and the door is something that compromises that.

I have no issues with my mom, and my reasons for wanting my door closed aren’t related to her in any way.

There are plenty of other reasons she wants the door closed too.

A couple of those reasons are that I prefer to be in enclosed environments, I hear less noise, and I can be more lenient with how loud I can speak to my friends online when my siblings are sleeping while I have my door closed.

I’ve been starting to feel like I’m in the wrong for wanting this because of what she tells me.

But one of the main reasons why I’ve been trying to close my door more often is due to my college work, which I can focus on when I remove as much distraction as possible.

She deserves to feel some peace in her own space.

What did Reddit have to say?

Her mom could be projecting her own issues onto her.

True connection doesn’t look like this.

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This seems like a great exercise in standing her ground.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a mother who thinks it’s the school’s job to discipline her unruly child, not hers.

There are actually safety benefits to having your door closed.

The daughter kept her reasons practical and respectful, which gives her mom a lot more credit than maybe she deserves in this moment.

Her mother’s desire to remain close with her adult children is real, but privacy is part of growing up and she needs to understand that.

Anyone old enough to vote or drink is old enough to decide whether their own bedroom door stays open.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.