When you live abroad, it is nice to come home to visit family whenever you can.

What would you do if you were visiting family, but your brother kept refusing to set up a time when you could meet his child?

That is what happened in this story, so he reached out to his brother’s ex to meet his nephew, which quickly caused a huge fight in the family with everyone picking sides.

While it is unfortunate that this happened, it seems like it all stems from an overreaction from his brother. Read through all the details below and see what you think.

AITAH for my meeting my nephew’s ex-fiancé and splitting my family apart?

I (33M) live overseas with my wife and daughter and have for about a decade, so I rarely get to visit home.

It is always nice to come home.

Last Christmas, we flew back so my family could finally meet our newborn daughter.

My close family is basically my parents, my older sister (45F), and her kids. The important one here we’ll call Greg (26M).

Not all relationships work out.

Greg had been with Dani (26F) since high school. They have a 5-year-old son together and were engaged, until Greg left her last year to date his co-worker.

According to Greg, Dani was manipulative and controlling, which she admitted to and apologised for. The situation was ugly, but we stayed out of it.

Of course they want to meet their nephew.

When we arrived home, Greg was living at my parents’ house while my dad renovated the home he’d bought with the co-worker. We met her, everything seemed cordial, and there were no issues.

But two days before Christmas, we still hadn’t met Greg’s son. Every time we asked, Greg had some excuse about work or Dani supposedly refusing to bring him over.

Why would this cause a problem?

My wife used to be friends with Dani, so she messaged her directly. Dani immediately said she’d never been asked and would love to meet us.

So, we arranged to meet Dani and the kid for coffee on Christmas Eve. My dad casually mentioned this to my sister, who immediately called Greg to let him know “what we were up to” and how disrespectful it was.

Wow, he is really freaking out over this.

Greg stormed out of work early and arrived just as Dani pulled into my parents’ driveway. He told her she wasn’t allowed inside, barged in yelling that we were going behind his back, and started causing a scene.

My wife and I explained that Dani had never done anything to us, and Greg had dodged the topic every time we asked about his son.

Greg said we had no right to contact Dani directly and that he wasn’t going to cave on this.

What is his problem?

At this point my wife was crying and my parents were screaming at him, so I gave in and told him fine, we’d cancel. It wasn’t worth the drama.

Dani left in tears and my wife went upstairs to be alone, but Greg kept banging on about how we’d betrayed him and how he wouldn’t forget it.

They aren’t going to put up with his abuse.

I finally snapped and called him an entitled little jerk who had ruined my wife’s Christmas over a cup of coffee with his ex. He tried to get physical with me before my parents threw him out.

Right after that, I angrily called Dani and told her we’d meet her anyway and that I didn’t care what Greg thought anymore.

The truth comes out.

We went for coffee, exchanged gifts, and talked about everything. That’s when we found out Greg hadn’t been paying full child support and had been dodging weekends with his son for over a month because of “illness.”

Dani suspects that’s the real reason Greg didn’t want us or my parents talking to her.

Things have gone from bad to worse at home.

When we got back, my parents were helping Greg move his furniture out. Apparently he’d come back for round two while we were gone.

My dad told him he could move into the house he’d bought with his co-worker because he was done renovating it for free after all this.

Greg is burning bridges.

Before Greg left, I asked if he really wanted things to end this way with his family. He said no, so I shook his hand and agreed to move on.

My wife tried to do the same and he told her “no thanks.” After that, I told him we were finished.

The rest of the family is taking sides.

On Christmas Day, none of my sister’s side of the family came to see my daughter or exchange gifts, even though they live a minute away.

Even the younger kids who’d been visiting daily suddenly stopped coming over. They said they’d been drinking and didn’t feel up to it.

I was mad, but I offered to come visit them instead. My sister said we’d need to leave within 30 minutes because Greg was coming over and would get upset. We obviously didn’t bother going.

It is awful when a family is torn apart like this.

The next day Greg called my dad asking why he hadn’t wished him Merry Christmas. My dad basically told him it should be obvious and hung up.

Ten minutes later my sister called saying she felt sorry for Greg and thought we owed him an apology. I snapped and told her she caused all this drama in the first place and couldn’t even make time to see my daughter after we flew halfway across the world to visit them.

She called me a spoiled brat and said she couldn’t wait for me to leave again. We never saw any of them again for the rest of the trip.

Greg is the one who seems controlling.

Since then, my sister has stopped letting her kids visit my parents, and my parents haven’t spoken to her or Greg since Christmas.

Greg also told Dani he’d pay more child support and spend more time with his son *if* she cut contact with my parents, who she’d gotten close to since the big fight.

Dani told him no, because her son barely got to meet his own grandparents until the drama at Christmas and he has every right to have a relationship with them.

The parents must be heartbroken.

My parents are pretty much alone now outside of extended family and Dani visiting them.

My sister’s kids are no longer allowed to visit them, except when they sneak in after school, and they’ve had zero contact with my sister or Greg since Christmas.

My mother had a couple of surgeries during that time and hadn’t received so much as a card.

Things just keep getting worse.

They bought Dani and the kid tickets to come with them to visit us in our country. The little guy is super excited to travel and spend more time with his little cousin.

Greg is threatening legal action to stop the trip, because apparently in the UK you technically need the father’s permission to take a child abroad even after separation.

Regardless of fault, this is an awful situation.

So, now my family is split in half, my parents have no one to take care of them and there’s potentially a court battle because we had a cup of coffee with my nephew’s ex.

AITAH?

It is awful that something so stupid led to so much drama, but at least based on the details in this story, it seems that Greg is the one who is at fault.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

Anyone who would stand up for Greg is out of line.

Greg is horrible.

This is not how child support works.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman whose family wants her to spend way too much time redoing paintings to make them match.

Here is someone who thinks he was entitled.

This commenter thinks Greg is a deadbeat dad.

He sounds like a deadbeat parent and that isn’t going to change. Trying to stay close to the nephew is a good idea, because the brother isn’t going to be there for him.