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“Wherever you want” sounds like a generous offer for a birthday dinner, but in this story, it came with a pretty lengthy list of exceptions.

One woman was celebrating her birthday at home with her parents, so they asked where she wanted to eat. Her dad told her it was her day, so it was her choice.

She suggested a first restaurant, and both parents said no. She tried a second, and her mom said it was too weird. A third got a laugh and a no from her dad.

Her mom began listing her own suggestions and told her to pick one.

When the woman pointed out that she’d been told she could choose, her mom called her selfish for not considering her dad’s dietary restrictions.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for having an adult tantrum on my birthday?

I (F27) am on the spectrum and sometimes have trouble noticing my levels of emotions, such as anger, sadness, fear, or exhaustion.

Other people notice it far before I do. This is something I’m working on, along with noticing the severity and weight of my words and actions.

So when her birthday came around, it immediately started some drama between her and her parents.

My birthday was a couple of days ago, and my parents, who I still live with, asked me where I wanted to go eat that night.

My dad said, “It’s your birthday, so it’s wherever you want.”

So she provided several options for her parents which they proceeded to promptly shut down.

I brought out the first option, and both of my parents immediately said no. I brought out another option, and my mom said that place is too weird (too exotic and not enough basic options).

I brought out another option, and my dad laughed and said no.

Soon her parents started providing their own alternatives, which seemed to go directly against their prior agreement.

My mom started listing suggestions on where we should go and told me to pick one of those.

I got a little frustrated and said, “You guys literally just said I could pick wherever I wanted.”

That’s when her mom pulled out the guilt trips.

My mom, shocked at what I just said and in that tone, told me I was being selfish and to think of the food accommodations my dad can have. He has diabetes and is a notoriously picky eater.

So she quickly found an alternative, but that still wasn’t suitable.

I brought out an online menu of a new sushi place none of us have tried before and found options my dad can have and that he likes.

My mom got frustrated and gave another no.

Dad was silent during the back-and-forth between me and my mom. I told them I needed some space and sat in my room for a bit.

AITA?

These parents aren’t as game as they claim to be when it comes to dining out.

What did Reddit make of this disagreement?

This commenter seems to think the birthday girl is completely valid here.

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This reader also agrees it wasn’t a tantrum.

This whole back-and-forth was completely unnecessary.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an adult child who feels like their family is asking them to donate to a fundraiser beyond their means.

This mother’s behavior is a huge pet peeve for this redditor.

“Wherever you want” turned out to mean “wherever we approve,” and she found that out one restaurant at a time.

Offering a choice and then shooting down every option is a frustrating setup for anyone, and her reaction was a justified response to it.

Her parents had their own reasoning, but even when the woman did go out of her way to accommodate her dad, it was still ruthlessly shut down.

Choosing a place for dinner shouldn’t be this frustrating.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.