Wedding workers really get to see it all!

And I’m talking about the good, the bad…and the ugly.

Today we’re going to hear from AskReddit users about marriages they knew were doomed when they worked at weddings.

Go ahead and dig in now!

Not a good sign.

“The groom would not make any eye contact with the bride.

So many photos where she is gazing lovingly at him, and he’s just like 10 yard stare right over the top of her head.”

Oops.

“While shooting video, I attached a microphone to the groom for audio and proceeded to prepare for the ceremony.

Just as I was about to adjust my audio settings, the groom stepped into another room with a friend.

As I put on my headphones, I overheard the groom confiding in his friend, describing the wedding as a “wedding of convenience” and reassuring them not to be concerned about what would happen in their relationship.”

Not a good start.

“I did a wedding for an acquaintance and her husband.

Day goes great, I’m really happy with almost everything I took, everyone was feeling it and having fun. But, (and this is one of the reasons I quit photography) the bride sees some of the photos I had sent her, and immediately is calling me. “I need you to do the editing magic and make me look skinny, John was saying I was going to look too fat in my dress and wanted me to lose weight but I knew you could just edit it, so haha I didn’t”.

So I have to explain (this is like 2010) I can only photoshop so much, I.e. I can make you look a tad slimmer in certain photos without making it noticeable. But I can’t do it to all of them, and if I was to, the editing would be noticeable, and I will have to charge you a lot of money to edit you in all the photos. She tried to convince me to edit hundreds of photos for a couple hundred bux, and I have other jobs going and had given them a great deal already so explained I couldn’t.

So she insists I do at least some of her main pics, I tell her when people see the rest of the pics they will see the difference, she didn’t care and insisted more. So I do, and a couple weeks later when I thought it was all done and history calls me and leaves me a voicemail of how I ruined her wedding, her new husband is upset at how she looks in the pics and keeps making remarks about her weight. So didn’t seem like they were in a great place from the get go.”

Different worlds.

“The groom’s speech included a line about how opposite he is from his bride because “her friends have never even been to Paris!””

Hmmm…

“Wedding was on a golf course. Bride had a vision she wanted of her husband driving up on a golf cart to see her for a first look.

He got one look at her from the top of the hill and vaulted the cart, ran down the hill, picked her up and twirled her around to tell her how gorgeous she was. We caught it all. It was the best first look ever.

Once he set her down she straightened herself and looked back to us. “Okay, I don’t want that. Let’s do the golf cart now.” And she sent him back up.”

Miserable.

“The bride looked visibly miserable the entire ceremony. While photographing the men’s “getting ready” portion, the groom repeatedly kept joking about ki**ing himself.

During the toast, the bride ran off to the bathroom for about 30 minutes and came back wiping her tears with her eyes red and puffy. Neither of them had any chemistry at all, it made no sense why they were together to me. That was the last wedding I shot.”

Didn’t last long.

“This was 15 years ago or so, I left wedding photography a few months later.

The reception was at their home, they didn’t want photos at the ceremony, and didn’t want wedding party/family photos between the ceremony and reception triggering the first raise of the eyebrow on my end. At the reception the groom didn’t want his brother, the best man, in the photos.

Other eyebrow goes up. The mothers of both the bride and groom both scolded me to let them be and told me to eat instead of take photos. The groom and the best man got unholy d**nk and had a weird by play of brother making way too many toasts and the groom making grossly inappropriate speeches of what he’s going to do to the bride on the honeymoon.

As the newlyweds were making their grand departure the bride tosses the bouquet, everyone cheers. The groom shouts “I knocked the b**ch up so hard she’s got two babies in her c**chie”. Guest react in various ways of shock and happiness about the pregnancy test but the best man lunges at the groom shouting and swearing. Family holds the best man back as the couple runs out to a car.

The groom flipped off the spectators, and pulled out of the driveway. Two houses down the car stops, the groom gets out and pukes on a neighbor’s lawn, the bride gets in the driver’s seat and takes off, leaving her husband yurking into a flower bed, and the best man ran down the street trying to flag down the car.

Divorced four months later.”

Yikes.

“The engagement session.

The couple was in from out of town because she had just taken the bar exam to become a lawyer. At the end of the session, I gave them a prompt to share with each other what they were proud of each other for. He couldn’t think of a single thing.

Somehow they still got married, complete with: the groom drinking 11 IPAs + several shots before the ceremony, mother of the bride so d**nk for family photos she pretended to strip, and the groom and all the groomsmen wearing camo hats with neon orange letters that said ‘ti**ies and beer.’

For the entire wedding day. Including sunset couples photos where he refused to do anything I suggested, nearly spat chew right on my feet, kept farting on purpose, and loudly complained about how all he wanted was to go have s**.”

Jerks.

“My mother was a wedding photographer till I was about 18-19 and I helped out on many of them. The one that stands out the most was when we were at a campsite where both the wedding and reception were being held.

About halfway through the reception I hear the groom start laughing maniacally. I peaked over his way and could see two groomsmen hauling the thrashing and screaming bride towards the lake. They threw her into the freezing cold water with her veil and dress still on. When she got out of the water I genuinely thought she might shoot somebody.

Saying she looked like a drowned rat would have been an insult to rats. Her hair and makeup and probably the dress were ruined beyond repair. The fact that the groom laughed and didn’t do anything stuck with me as being a dog s**t move even as a teen. Apparently she thought so too because they didn’t even make it 6 months.”

Wow… some of these stories are insane!