June 1, 2025 at 7:55 am

She’s In A Wedding Party, But Doesn’t Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Don’t Get It

by Ashley Ashbee

Color swatches

Pexels/Reddit

Gender expression is often referenced by many conservative people as only valid if it’s traditional.

When the pressure to be traditional comes from your own family, it’s painful to say the least.

See what’s going on with this family.

AITA For Not Wearing a Dress?

I’m a cis masculine woman that’s literally had top surgery.

I have not worn a dress or dressed feminine in years.

My family is for the most part, accepting.

My sister is getting married and I am in the wedding party.

The preparation is far from joyous.

It’s already so incredibly stressful to find formal wear as a 5’1 person who wears men’s clothing, so the plan was me to just wear what the groomsmen are wearing and get it tailored.

That enabled my sister to call the company and get some swatches of fabric and make me a tie with the sage green floral print the bridesmaids are wearing.

Apparently her future mother-in-law doesn’t like the idea of me being in the bridal party and wearing a suit.

That stirred up more trouble.

So my sister wants me to just “Suck it up and wear the dress.”

I just responded with, if it’s such an issue, I’m not going to be in the wedding.

My entire family is basically insinuating I’m selfish for not “Sucking it up for one day” and just wearing the dress to make my sister happy.

AITA?

Should I just put my own comfort aside and wear a dress to make my sister happy?

Here is what people are saying.

Exactly. The irony of them expecting consideration for their gender expresssion.

Screenshot 2025 05 11 at 11.16.03 PM Shes In A Wedding Party, But Doesnt Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Dont Get It

See? It’s not hard.

Screenshot 2025 05 11 at 11.17.54 PM Shes In A Wedding Party, But Doesnt Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Dont Get It

Definitely. Don’t expect people to tolerate someone hating them.

Screenshot 2025 05 11 at 11.18.26 PM Shes In A Wedding Party, But Doesnt Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Dont Get It

Exactly. How can they not see their hypocrisy and shallowness?

Screenshot 2025 05 11 at 11.18.36 PM Shes In A Wedding Party, But Doesnt Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Dont Get It

Definitely. Hate is still alive and well.

Screenshot 2025 05 11 at 11.18.58 PM Shes In A Wedding Party, But Doesnt Feel Comfortable Wearing A Dress, And Some Of Her Family Members Dont Get It

This wedding planning is a bad omen.

And this family needs to get it together.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.

Ashley Ashbee | Contributing Writer, Workplace & Culture

Ashley Ashbee is a contributing writer for TwistedSifter specializing in workplace dynamics, employee advocacy, and professional culture. Drawing on her real-world experience as a software consultant, she brings a unique, insider perspective to navigating office conflicts, toxic management, and trending professional dilemmas.

Holding a degree in Professional Writing from York University, Ashley combines her formal editorial training with her corporate background to deliver highly engaging, empathetic narratives. She excels at breaking down complex workplace dramas and translating them into stories that truly empower and validate modern workers.

Based in St. Catharines, Ontario, Ashley balances her time between the tech and publishing worlds with her love for the outdoors. When she isn’t consulting or writing, she can usually be found exploring local walking trails or experimenting with new recipes in the kitchen.

Connect with Ashley on LinkedIn and Twitter/X.