This bride has had her wedding vision set for a long time, including wearing a necklace left to her by her late grandmother.

With her grandparents playing a major role in her upbringing, the piece carries deep emotional meaning—especially with them no longer around for the big day. Just a week before the wedding, her future mother-in-law surprised her with an expensive necklace and implied it should be worn at the ceremony.

Now she’s stuck between honoring her past and navigating the expectations of a new family.

WIBTA if I wore my late grandma’s necklace at my wedding instead of the one my soon-to-be MIL is gifting me?

Hi, my wedding is next week, and on Thursday my soon-to-be MIL gifted me a very extravagant necklace set. I thanked her for it and then she said it would look good at the wedding on me.

I kind of froze, didn’t know what to say because it seemed like it was assumed I’d wear it.

I had been planning on wearing my late grandma’s necklace that she had left for me.

I see where this is going.

I was very close to my maternal grandparents, my parents are doctors and so they had long hours and so I spent a lot of time with my grandparents and was very close to them. As it is I get a bit sad that they aren’t here for my wedding.

I brought this up with my fiance and my parents.

My fiancé says he understands where I’m coming from but was like his mom really likes me, and she gave that gift with a lot of love, and it would hurt her if I didn’t wear it, that it would lead to misunderstandings in a new relationship.

Oof.

He said obviously I have the final say but he just wanted me to think about that before deciding.

My mom is really sympathetic to me too.

But she also says that my grandma would understand, and echoed my fiance’s sentiment that my MIL had given it with love.

This makes things 10x more difficult.

I understand all that, and I like my MIL, shes a sweet woman.

I don’t want to look difficult in rejecting a gift like that but I also just want to wear my grandma’s necklace.

Would that make me an AH?

With her fiancé and mother both gently encouraging her to consider her mother-in-law’s perspective, the decision feels heavier than it should.

So she’s turning to Reddit to ask whether prioritizing her grandmother’s necklace makes her insensitive…or simply true to herself.

This person votes NTA, and says a week before is WAY too late to gift something like this.

This person says to just explain her thoughts…people will understand.

And this person says there are really no true jerks, but there is a solution.

A wedding accessory shouldn’t come with emotional fine print…but somehow this one did.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.